LET’S BE HONEST
Diary of an Online Dating Newbie
A single mama’s search for love
Monday 11–12 pm: Love is a swipe away. I can feel it on my fingertips. I set up a bio, select a few pics to show off my different interests: fitness, great chef, book lover, outdoor explorer.
A few minutes later the notifications start to go off. I swipe at the suggestions. Too old. No. Next. Are you even legal? too smooth. Heelll no!! Swipe. Swipe. Swipe.
Wait…Stop. Go back. No back again…..Right there. The sporty-looking dude on a bike. He looks super fit with nicely greying hair. Pics all taken outdoors. Camping, running a marathon, hiking with his friends. There is one of him with a dog, another at a children’s home.
I send a message. I am hoping for some mature conversation and companionship.
Tuesday 11–12 pm: We get chatting. He is over 40. Never married. No kids. We swap photos, childhood stories and plans for the future. He’s ticking a couple of boxes I must say.
Tuesday 4–6 pm: I sign off work early today. There is a lot of planning to do. I need an outfit for the date { the one I am sure is coming} Plus I need to do my hair and nails.
Wednesday 8 -9 a.m: I sit down to work, but I find myself thinking about Mr Abs. I scour the web trying to find dirt on him. I find none.
Not sure if that is a good sign. Someone who has been around that long must have some few skeletons?
I log onto the app and find a message from him. A fun GIF wishing me a good day.
Thursday 11–12 pm: I am making myself a bit scarce. Can’t look like I don't have a life or a job or other friends. I find a message from him. Lunch tomorrow? Can I let you know this evening?
Friday 12–12:30 pm: I put on a flowery little dress, a dash of makeup and some comfortable heels. I head out thirty minutes earlier and get a seat facing the entrance.
Friday 1–3 pm: I am scrolling through my phone trying to maintain an aloof posture.
Five minutes to date time I get a text from him.
I look towards the door, ready to be wowed.
He strolls in.
In padded bike shorts and a neon green jersey with a helmet in one hand.
My jaw drops. My eyes widen. I swear I let out a little squeak. “What the hell are you wearing?”
Saturday 11–12 pm: It was actually fun until it wasn’t. In the beginning, it was great. He had a lot of fascinating insights on different topics. On adventure being the elixir for boredom in old age. I loved it.
He couldn’t get through a conversation without talking about his next venture. Life was was nothing more than fun to him.
But then, the date happened.
And then it hit me: he was just another man-child. Adventure was his way of running away from responsibility, from actually having to grow up.
I realised he had no intention of settling down, ever.
Saturday 4–6 pm: Love is a swipe away. I can feel it on my fingertips.
Who else is out there?
Thanks to Susan Brearley for the writing prompt.
As always thanks for reading. Keep the comments and corrections coming.
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