Deep Passionate Love Has Died Down

That’s How You Can Spark Old Classic Love in Your Life

“Oh Simon, I love you so much”, whispered Jacqueline with her eyes closed. That is a line by a character, a young lady, in the novel Death on The Nile by Agatha Christie.

This simplest form of expressing love still lingers on today. The difference is the message it conveys. In earlier days you could feel the warmth by these simple words. Now, until and unless you don’t do fancy stuff nobody takes you seriously like going to the moon and back.

Although the novel itself is not a romantic one but deeply and intricately describes human behaviours and relations.

I have somewhat developed a habit of reading mystery novels by Agatha Christie every now and then and in between the self-help books. It is a great refresher for the brain. If you ever feel like bored by the kind of books you are reading, you can always take a break or change a book for once.

I, pick the classics by Miss Christie. There is so much in her novels Not only the carefully knitted story but also many other things.

Human Relations

I am a millennial and one of the greatest mysteries for me is human relations. I could never get hold of them. One moment I have all figured out and the other it seems I know nothing.

Why? Because we don’t have face to face relationships. Friendships are shifted to social media. Conversations have taken the form of chatting. Sure we think that we are more open now than ever before. But having a face to face conversation with someone is a whole lot different.

Communication

The way people communicated back in the days was admirable. I have noticed that words were merely a part of the communication process. Gestures like eye movement, facial expressions, and words which were not spoken was a major part of the process.

The characters described in the novels paint a complete picture of their persona. The protagonist of these novels has the ability to weigh the person just before they even speak. Descriptions like “Mrs Allerton was a good-looking, white-haired woman. She had an air of authority.” And “Ms Bowers was a tall capable looking woman”, “The two men were tall, spare, with greying hair, and clean-shaven, clever looking faces”.

Notice the descriptions of the characters? Not only their physical appearance is described in a simple and detailed manner but also what kind of people they are. Now, this is only a work of fiction but it is possible that people in the 19th Century did think like that.

Not all but those individuals who were social creatures, who dwelled on their circle of friends. They could instantly watch a person and try to estimate what kind of household he belongs to, which occupation he/she has and subtle psychological cues like confidence, confusion and so forth.

What has changed now? Everything. You don’t recognize a person even after spending years with someone. Because we don’t use the body language, the presence of mind when talking with each other nor do we observe these things in others. These things have almost died out.

Non-verbal cues like how a person shifts his body after a comment, eye movement, and uneasiness in the manner are not recognized in most cases and not even displayed in some cases.

We like to talk to each other by hiding behind the cyber wall. The more the world preaches to accept yourself and others the way you and they are the more we don’t like ourselves. On social media, anyone can be anyone and most people are posing as someone they are actually not.

The conversations held this way lack the basic warmth of human connection. You don’t know how your comments have affected someone. The replies come after thinking and carefully controlled strategy. Instant indicators like facial expressions are lost in-between.

The world is moving so fast. We don’t have time for anything. We are running after God knows what. It’s one destination after the other. Forgetting that there is no destination and life is a journey we have forgotten how to enjoy the scenery in this journey.

There are passengers with us on this train with us but we are so eager to look into the future. It is always the future so even when we reach a place which we once desired in the past we don’t even know because we are still looking in the future. We have forgotten how to enjoy the present.

Get some time out. Have a real conversation with the sake of just having a connection with someone. That someone can be anyone even with someone whom you meet daily. Try to be present and notice the person as a whole, not just the words. Try to figure out how they feel, how their voice changes by mentioning certain names and places. Notice the person in front of you when you are talking about how they respond.

There is a great hidden treasure in us. All the books of fiction authors write come from people. It’s their ability to mimic human behaviour to the extreme which enables them to produce classics like Pride and Prejudice, Wuthering Heights, Crime and Punishment, To Kill a Mocking Bird. The inspiration comes from human behaviour.

The ability to understand and read human emotions in daily lives can bring great benefits. We can instantly find out what upsets and what pleases people. A lot of human transactions including love and hatred are happening on social media but there is still a load of currency still exchanged in the real world.

The real world is the world where we live. It is the place which we come back at the end. So pay attention to not only your surroundings in general but also to people in specific.

Observe when listening and speaking most of your problems can be solved. The confusions, the debauchery, the lies and deceits which we think are mostly our inability to reach the right conclusion. We don’t understand what people are saying and then we blame each other.

Don’t be surprised to find out that someone who said “I love you” actually hates you and someone who said “I hate you” actually loves you.