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Deciding Money vs. Passion During a Time of Crisis

Why I refused a job so I could write on Medium

A few days ago, I got a job offer. Initially, I said no because I didn’t agree on how much they were going to pay me. But they came back several days later with almost twice the offer.

It’s getting harder to say no for several reasons.

The amount of money had me reconsider. Not only that it was more than a fair price to compensate my expertise, but also because I took one more hard look at the situation surrounding me right now. The situation all of us are in.

I have to put a pandemic into consideration. Uncertain times, they say. I feel like I need to work as much as possible right now while I can. While I still have the opportunity to do so, especially when many others have lost their means of income.

Is now a good time to choose passion over money?

Around the time I got the job offer, I was also receiving my first paycheck from Medium after joining the Partner Program last month. It’s not much, but there’s no word to accurately explain my excitement. I simply couldn’t believe that I got paid by writing here.

I was also excited when I found out that more people are reading my stuff lately. All of these things have motivated me to explore this platform more seriously.

I had planned to dedicate several hours a day to write more stories here. For my main job, I had rescheduled my current work-from-home routine so I will only work a maximum of 4 hours every day. The rest of the day is for Medium.

But now with the job offer, I am at the crossroad. The initial job description they showed me indicated that it’s going to be a tedious work with dozens of total working hours. Technically, I can still handle one side gig right now. In fact, I have plenty of time. But if accept it, those free hours would be non-existent.

You might suggest that I should write in the evening after my working hours. But I have chosen my best productive hours for writing for one big reason:

Writing takes more effort for me.

I have no formal training whatsoever in writing. But the hardest part is the fact that I am not a native English speaker. Growing up, it’s not even my second, third, or fourth language. And here I’m planning to conquer the sea of English-speaking audience with my terrible grammar.

Therefore, I would need to treat writing to be more than just an amusing hobby. I have a lot to improve. Most importantly, as pointed out in many writing tips articles I read here on Medium, I need to keep writing. A lot.

Holding onto the mindset of abundance

I asked opinions from friends about whether or not I should refuse the job and go on with writing. Many of them were supportive and encouraged me to focus on my Medium passion project, but there were also quite a number of friends who advised the opposite.

One of the intriguing arguments is that there will be a time for passion in the future. As for right now, I should focus on surviving first. There is also an interesting perspective I should consider. It is that I actually should be grateful not only that I got an offer, but they are also willing to pay me in the amount that I prefer.

These different perspectives reminded me of the mindset of abundance. The abundance mindset is a belief that there are enough things for everybody, whether it’s resources, wealth, or opportunities. The opposite of the abundance mindset is the scarcity mindset. As you might have guessed, it’s a belief of “there will not be enough.”

I am a believer in that mindset. But lately, it’s something that’s very hard to hold onto. I’m questioning whether it is something that’s sensible to believe in, and that I am not being out of touch with reality.

Today, I think many will agree that everything looks more scarce than it is abundant, especially if we’re talking about jobs and the economy as a whole. Statistics also back our worries, as experts forecasted a grim economic outlook that could continue beyond this year if a vaccine remains yet to be found.

Taking some actionable steps

So, what was it that I ended up doing?

I would like to stubbornly keep my belief in abundance, so I chose Medium. But it’s not a blind decision without some follow up actions. Therefore, I also did the following:

Make a list of pros and cons.

I consider every scenario (me taking the job versus me focusing on Medium), in great detail. It doesn’t matter which one has more advantages or disadvantages. The most important thing is I know what I get myself into.

Make up for the projected loss.

By not choosing the job, I lost a fixed amount of money. This is my opportunity cost. I have to make up for that in another way.

But it doesn’t have to be with actual money.

It means I have to keep the discipline with my writing projects. What’s the point if I end up using the time to browse social media or to do other counterproductive activities. I have to make my decision worth it by completing the writing milestones I previously set up.

Accept and stick to my decision, no matter the outcome.

Things don’t just stop after making a decision. I have to live with the consequence. I still don’t know if writing here going to be a failure or not. As for now, I have lots of drafts to write. I need to do more research. I sent a couple of stories to several publications and still waiting to hear back from them. Or maybe never. It’s uncertain, but this is the path I have chosen.

Reach out for support.

It’s really helpful to get some outside perspectives. So I contacted friends I know has a similar dilemma in the past. Their advice and supports are something you will be grateful for in this situation. Sometimes, we already know the answer to our dilemma, but we just want to hear some assurance. Supportive people will make you less crazy when making a seemingly unsensible decision.

Final note

I believe the perfect time for passion is anytime, whether there’s a crisis or not. In fact, a crisis actually helps to put things in perspective. You know what really matters for you.

I also know that if it’s about money I’m worried about, at least at this moment I’m not in trouble finance-wise, and hopefully not in the near future. There will be another opportunity. I probably made somebody else very happy, somebody that’s now taking the job instead of me. They might need it more than I do.

The path I’m choosing right now is an investment for myself, which I have to be willing to play the long game. Like with any investment, I have to accept the risk.

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