Dear Writer — When Do You Spit, Gargle or Swallow?
What you do in bed could find its way into your stories.
When do you spit, gargle or swallow?
And it is what you think what it is.
So a friend asks me, do you spit or swallow? I said, let me tell you when I spit, gargle and swallow.
He said, what do I mean? I tell him it was my running joke with my sex therapist. I would greet my sex therapist on her birthday and taught me when to spit, gargle, and swallow.
This story is (NSFW.)
I spit when I don’t have any feelings for the guy, I gargle when I want to show off, and I swallow when I love the guy. I know, gargling is an overstretch.
It sounds funny whenever I tell friends about it. But it is true.
Today I noticed that there are times when I write, I follow the same rules. I am amused that what I practice in bed could find its way into my stories.
And it isn’t just me. I see it happen with other writers. I see in some writers their different selves, and it wasn’t only in their tone. It was in the stories they share and the way they tell it.
I wrote stories in the past that are not planned. Spur at the moment kind-of-stories, and surprisingly these stories get the most readers.
Whenever I meet someone, and the moment I start to think about the ifs and buts, nothing happens. Either it ends up badly or becomes a missed opportunity.
But encounters with strangers need not be too personal, but it doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be pleasurable.
When I am at the moment, carefree, I am a different person. I can be fun and funny. And I grab the opportunity, C’est la vie.
When I don’t think about my inner critic and wait for my writing muse, I get things done… It is when I spit.
I spit when;
- I am carefree.
- I am detached.
- I am spontaneous.
I spit, and you should too.
Technology excites me. I am a geek. I wear it with a badge of honor. Where the world is going excites me.
I keep up with technology trends. It is why when I fixed my laptop, I felt I regained my superpowers.
When I was torn between purchasing a second monitor, believing it will improve my productivity as a writer. Not only did I do my research, but I reached out to my tribe, the geeks like me.
When we know about the things we write, our confidence shows in our words. And people gravitate to people with authority on the subject.
And you don’t have to be the best in the field. One has to share their A-game. One should be willing to take risks, and express their strong opinion and not care about what people think or say about you or your stories.
As long as we don’t become obnoxious, we can show some aggression with our words as writers. There are times one has to use stronger language to tell better stories. Remember, we need to keep our readers hooked.
Even Stephen King doesn’t mince words. He curses in his book. He uses profanity.
When I am less shy, not cocky, when I want to surprise, when I give in to my wild self, it is when I gargle.
I gargle when;
- I take the lead.
- I go after what I want.
- I am confident.
I gargle, and you should too.
The first time I swallowed, it was unexpected.
But it was because I loved him. I know he wanted it, and I wanted it too.
I speak for myself, but some stories are very close to my heart. The stories I will not get tired of writing about. The stories I am heavily invested in. Stories about my MOM, the environment, and equality.
I have been volunteering for different causes. I care about issues, from accessibility to the differently-abled and what impacts the LGBTQ+ community.
I am very passionate when I write about these topics, and my stories come from the heart.
As writers, we lend our voice to those who can’t speak.
As writers, we have the gift for words when people need to know the truth. As writers, we should champion others, and not only ourselves.
When I am emotional, when I speak from my heart, when I am passionate, it is when I swallow.
I swallow when;
- I am selfless.
- I am in tune with my feelings.
- I am giving.
I swallow, and you should too.
My writing journey is my own, as you would discover yours.
While we can learn from other writers, the worse thing we can do is think we need to become just like them.
That is why I believe writing courses you find here are a big waste of your time and money.
Their success will never be yours or mine.
Not because we deserve less but because our success will be different.
As writers, we learn new things about ourselves. We become in harmony with the person who writes and the person we have yet to discover.
We unearth stories from the past, look at them from a different lens, and can objectively detach ourselves from them. Becoming impersonal isn’t a bad thing. It is nothing else but others.
Who we are in bed tells a lot about ourselves. We can try different things, please ourselves, and pleasure the person we are with.
Again, what works for others may not necessarily work for you. Physical and mental orgasm is uniquely your own.
Your journey as a writer could be a reflection of who you are in bed. Are you a giver or a receiver?
