Dear Bob: Donuts Can’t Fix Workplace Culture

What To Do If You Really Want Workplace Evolution

If the bewildered look on the faces of these three women reminds you of expressions you’ve made during meetings at your workplace, read on. I’m going to take you on a high-calorie journey from the conference room to the break room.

Imagine this scene at a successful, small business with 25 employees. The company opened its doors thirty years ago. Many of the employees who work there have been there since the beginning.

It’s a cloudy Monday morning and employees are returning to the office after working remotely for the past six months. While gathered in the conference room for their team meeting, a couple of co-workers with a tattered interpersonal history, began arguing. One was convinced that the other had taken their coffee mug. (The staff were given matching coffee mugs a few years prior). The accusation led to more accusations and rehashings of previous transgressions. Tempers flared and the meeting quickly turned into a verbal sparring match that continued until Bob, the CEO, yelled a few well known expletives.

The three new employees, seated next to one another, had the same jaw dropping reaction about the behavior they witnessed from Bob and their co-workers. After the meeting, their more seasoned peers informed them, “This is how we talk to one another here. Get use to it!”

The employees spent the rest of the day unproductive and underwhelmed. Although they didn’t voice it, some secretly hoped that things would change in 2021, but the only thing that changed was the amount of their paychecks after their January bonus. “Mo Money Mo Problems.” Someone cue Notorious BIG.

The day ended almost as fast as it began, and no one saw or heard from Bob the rest of the day.

The next morning, Bob strategically placed two boxes of glazed donuts in the break room with a post-it note on top that read, “If you have a good attitude today, have a donut on me.” Will someone please inform Bob that donuts can’t fix workplace culture?

Donuts are about as relevant as shorthand in the modern workplace. I’m not sure if they ever served any purpose other than reducing the waistband elasticity of the indulgent.

The toxic traditions in this company shaped the workplace culture into an old, ugly shoe that no one wants to wear, especially not Bob. This behavioral template poses a myriad of wicked issues, but most importantly, it makes it extremely difficult to attract and retain new talent, and morale and engagement are on life support.

Less than two months later, the three new employees who witnessed “The Real Conference Rooms of Jackson County” quit within days of one another. Their reasoning? The company’s culture is not aligned with their personal codes of professional conduct.

Bob took the reins as CEO ten years ago, but the truth of the matter is that culture went off the rails at least twenty years prior to the conference room showdown. Cursing from the C-Suite and belittling staff has always been acceptable. The employees who were there back then can’t recall how things went awry, nor do they care. The previous CEO used foul language to motivate poorly performing employees to perform better. In most cases, it worked. When Bob came on board, he recognized the pattern and quickly began to use his natural sailor style of communication on a regular basis.

Most of the senior leaders and staff are eligible for retirement and the highlight of their time at work consists of crossing through dates on their desk calendars. Many brag that they can smell retirement a mile away and never tire of reminding the rest of the world how close they are to spending their weekdays in Florida.

In the meantime, the fumes from yesteryears dysfunction continues to float between cubicles and waft into offices that look like they belong in a 1980's used car dealership. If you inhale deeply enough, you can still smell the Marlboro smoke in the wood paneling and worn carpet squares.

Although Bob didn’t create the culture, he comes from a generation that believes status quo is sexy. Obviously he didn’t get the memo which explains why he’s still rocking that tan “Members Only” jacket. Staff often make fun of Bob’s huge eyeglasses which appear to have been purchased back when Pearle Vision was one of the hottest spots to pick up glasses and hot chicks (Bob’s language, not mine).

I’m sure you agree that the culture is broken, but is Bob’s leadership the bigger issue here or is it his outdated style? Could it be that his wardrobe is a symptom of his resistance to change?

Bob Isn’t Alone

What’s happening at this small business is happening in many businesses, large and small. Many leaders have chosen to keep bouncing the ball the same way they’ve always bounced it, but they haven’t noticed that the stripes on the ball have worn off, and it doesn’t bounce as high as it once did because it doesn’t hold air like it should anymore. Day after day, week after week, month after month, and year after year, leaders keep bouncing that same rusty, crusty, and dusty ball in the same spot, and they never dribble or pass because they don’t know how.

Here’s a bit of simple advice for all the Bob’s in the workplace who are resistant to change and challenged by broken workplace culture. You don’t need to keep bouncing the same old ball. That ball is broken. You need a new ball, and in addition to bouncing the ball, you need to learn how to dribble, and know when to pass the ball. This requires coordination and collaboration of course, but it also requires good judgment.

In order for the culture to change, Bob has to first change his behavior and work with the team to determine who they are, what they believe in, and how they will interact, behave, and communicate with one another. They also need to decide which traditions are worth holding onto and which need a one-way ticket to who cares.

I think we should call Bob and ask him the question of the day. “Do you want workplace evolution?” (Kirk Franklin fans will get it.) If his answer is yes, it will require a hard team reset accompanied by new attitudes and new strategies.

Thank you for taking this workplace journey with me. I hope that you enjoyed it!