mental health poetry

Danger

A poem on panic attack

A sudden noise violently drags me out Of my peaceful sleep and I can’t shout I look around in the darkness As fear climbs on the mattress

It grabs my eyes and then my brain The gates are opened to its domain My heart is going to explode There was no warning code

A few deep breaths until I’m back Logic now gets back on track I’m not in danger as it seems My brain likes going to the extremes

I burry myself under the heavy covers At least I won’t be bothered by others My heart slows down enough to catch another breath Just enough for me to sink to a comforting depth

This poem is about a panic attack I had about two years ago. It occurred while I was drifting into deep sleep, due to a loud noise in the hallway very close to my front door.

The first few seconds were the worst, because I felt that I was in real danger. Fortunately, I was able to calm down enough to understand that it’s a panic attack. Identifying the source helped a lot. It took me several more minutes to stop feeling scared.

Feeling like someone might suddenly come into my space is a major trigger for me. I am used to all the noises my neighbors make, but that time was different as I was almost asleep so my guard was down.

Since then, I invested in a good white noise machine and it has helped tremendously. It has many settings, but I mostly use the white noise and the one that sounds like waves.