Dance How You Want to Dance
There Really Are No Rules
When I was a small girl and just starting to go to teen dances, everybody danced pretty much the same way. I had never danced before, so I hung out with some girlfriends and watched how people danced. We always stood next to the speakers, and I think that is where I began to lose my hearing.
I remember listening to the Stones singing “Wild Horses” and the Bee Gees singing “Massachusetts”. Those songs were for the slow dances, and I definitely did not step out onto the dance floor for them. But I still love a sorrowful, slow ballad. Only the most popular kids were out on the floor for the slow dances. The last time I had kissed a boy was in the second grade and it would be another five years or so before I did again.
When they played faster songs the floor was crowded. There were popular dances the kids danced, and we learned them: the Shrug, the Twist, and the Swim. I remember being very concerned that I did not do anything that was out of the ordinary. In my mind, individuality was a dangerous thing even to consider. If you didn’t do it exactly the way the popular kids danced, you could never hope to be cool.
As I recall, we were terribly concerned we were all too fat. Twiggy was very popular then, and to be beautiful, you needed to be stick-thin. I never was. I remember we wore fishnet stockings. Pantyhose had not been invented yet, so we had garter belts to hold up our stockings. We wore white lipstick and white nail polish. Mini-skirts were just then coming into fashion. That’s what the girls wore.
We went to teen dances on alternating Fridays at the American embassy in Oslo, Norway. The Vietnam War was going on then and there were times when there were protests in front of the embassy and our dances would be canceled. We were only eleven and twelve years old at the time and did not realize what was going on.
The funny thing is almost 60 years later, that’s how I still dance. I can’t move as I did then since I’ve slowed down and gained a lot of weight. I’m certainly not as flexible, and with a sketchy back and having recovered from a horrible bout of frozen shoulders, it’s all debatable. However, if nobody is watching, I think it might be fun to dance on the kitchen floor all by myself.
Years later, my husband and I never really danced together. Those were the days when we were both drinking. The problem was, the more I drank, the less I was able to dance. He was just the opposite. So, we sort of got into the habit of not dancing.
I’ll let you in on a little secret. It is very nice to dance with Spirit. I haven’t done it very much lately, but I can remember once Seth took me out for a waltz on our kitchen floor many years ago. In my imagination, I was wearing a bright yellow ballgown. He took my hand and whirled me around an imaginary ballroom. I was breathless. Opening my eyes, it was me in my regular clothes, by myself in the kitchen in tears because the experience was so moving. It is something. You have to pretend, but for an instant, you can be swept away on the light fantastic. Is it real? As real as channeling can be. So, yes, it is real.
That could be one of the new things I do this year. It can be my own exercise/dance class. Perhaps the cats will watch, or more likely, they will hide and come out when it is safe to do so.