GOTTA LOVE THOSE ***
Crickets Versus Piranhas: MuddyUm’s Editorial Difference
You’re getting what you haven’t paid for
As a writer who’d barely worked up the nerve to approach publications, I was thrilled when Susan Brearley encouraged me to submit my very first attempt at humor. At best, it’s mildly funny. In retrospect, it’s long-winded.
Kickers were new to me. They’re fun. No ellipses allowed? I can live with that! Though now I’m embarrassed that ellipses dotted my work emails in another life. No parens either? OK. It’s a small price to pay to be an Outlaw. MuddyUm is teaching me to write better.
Then as a new Mudditor, I discovered the fine print of Cap’n Susan’s acceptance. MuddyUm lives to nurture your humor talent! “We want to encourage people as much as possible” is a basic pub tenet.
You put in the effort to follow MuddyUm’s stated submission guidelines. We’ll work some editing magic according to our Mudditorial specialties. But aboard ship, we play nice. Mudditors remember those who accept free editing, yank away their story, then publish it elsewhere. Not fondly. Are you itching to be harpooned — umm, lampooned? ’Cause Cap’n Susan’ll do it.
You submitted your story and are waiting to hear back from an editor. Three days go by. Then a week, or even two. Crickets. Sorry, that’s some other publication. Mudditors aim to read and publish — or leave at least one private note on — your darling baby within 24 hours.
So far, story rejection is the exception. All Outlaws have an “in” with the captain — she accepted you as a writer! We want to publish your story if we can. With a growing fleet of piratical followers, Outlaw crew members are working together to keep our good ship MuddyUm cresting the waves.
We, like you, hope your story will be distributed and read by thousands. Or at least earn you claps and new followers.
Mudditors generally don’t fix typos and grammar errors. We know you’re as smart and capable as we are. After all, you are we and we are you — Mudditors come up through the ranks.
One Mudditor usually takes point on your story, seeing it through to publication. If more than one editor helps you, we’ll try to avoid an asterisk blizzard — but the best way to minimize asterisks is to follow our guidelines. You really, really don’t want to face Cap’n Susan’s wrath if she’s your primary editor and you:
- left lots of typos
- didn’t follow the guidelines. What were you thinking!?!
- expect *her* to fix these things for you ☠️😱
Though editing isn’t more art than skill, they’re at least equal where humor is concerned. I’ve got your back on the “boring” stuff — typos, punctuation, capitalization, congruence, missing words — so may “swoop in” on your story, whether draft or published. Another Mudditor *always* notices passive voice and wordiness. Stay tuned for future stories about our editorial specialties.
Susan doesn’t identify as swoopy but keeps a keen eye on story seaworthiness — count yourself lucky if our Cap’n deigns to drop a note on your story. Whether or not it adds an asterisk.
Feel free to poke fun at us! We’re all Outlaws.
One Mudditor, with a fondness for geekiness and the offbeat, occasionally publishes a story other editors agree on Slack to reject. Think about that if you consider it a crime against writerhood when multiple editors clutter up your right margin with asterisks — which should be rare, going forward.
Regarding Slack, it’s cumbersome and time-consuming to go off-platform. I brainstormed a few ideas to free Mudditors from depending on Slack:
- one or more editors may work on your story while it’s “locked for editing,” during which you can’t see editorial changes or notes
- private notes are editable, leading to fewer asterisks
- editors can “see private note history”
- a “track changes” feature enables writers to accept all, reject all, or accept/reject/modify individual editorial changes
- are there unanswered questions or unaddressed issues? writers and editors can easily tell what stage the story is in
- a “version comparison” feature enables easy review of changes made since the last writing or editing session
Any of those enhancements could make writers’ and editors’ jobs easier. I hope the Powers That Be are paying attention. Until then, we’re muddling through somehow.
P.S. I’m experimenting with SEO. How do you think this will fly in the algorithms? “MuddyUm doesn’t believe in crickets! MuddyUm nurtures your humor talent! Don’t be a story-yanker. Rhymes with wanker. You too could become a Mudditor.”
This story was inspired by Kristi Keller’s piece below, discussed at a Mudditor meeting. We of course have no idea which pub’s pool you fell into, Kristi, but you’re right, there’s gotta be a more efficient way to edit! Alas, we’re limited to what the platform allows, plus Slack.