Covid-19 Came, but Did it Leave?

Summary

The author shares a personal account of battling Covid-19 Omicron, detailing the mental and physical symptoms experienced, the struggle with "long Covid," and the uncertainty of full recovery.

Abstract

The author, a Covid-19 Omicron survivor, recounts a harrowing journey through the illness, emphasizing that while they did not require hospitalization, the virus's impact extended beyond the typical respiratory symptoms. They describe intense brain fog, disorientation, and a profound inability to concentrate or maintain logical thought processes. The narrative also touches on the neurological effects, such as vertigo, fatigue, coordination issues, and unexplained pains and numbness. The author reflects on the fear and confusion caused by the disease, acknowledging the heightened anxiety and the surreal experience of feeling controlled by an alien presence. Despite the ordeal, they express a sense of gratitude for their survival and a determination to understand the lingering effects of "long Covid," which continues to affect their daily life and work as a freelance writer.

Opinions

The author believes Covid-19 Omicron is more than just a physical illness; it significantly affects mental faculties, causing brain fog and hampering cognitive functions.
They suggest that the full impact of Covid-19 is not widely understood, particularly the ongoing symptoms associated with "long Covid."
The author implies that the illness is akin to a living organism, with the ability to manipulate the body and mind, creating a sense of loss of control.
There is a clear frustration with the persistent nature of the virus, as the author is uncertain about when, or if, they will fully recover.
The author expresses empathy for those who have had more severe cases, acknowledging their own relatively mild experience in comparison.
They highlight the professional challenges faced by freelancers dealing with the aftermath of Covid-19, including the struggle to maintain productivity and meet deadlines.

Covid-19 Came, but Did it Leave?

And so, I got the dreaded illness, the pandemic, the plague. I am still alive and, from what I can tell, I’m okay…so far. And I got sick, really sick with fevers, coughs, sneezes, and horrible headaches. No, I didn’t go to the hospital. No, I didn’t die. I am grateful for that. That’s something I want to make clear first off.

Now, I’m going to complain. I’m going to reveal something that I figured out by having Covid-19 Omicron. It feels like a cold, a bad one. But it feels like something else too. I wonder if anyone told you about the brain fog, the forgetfulness, and the outright inability to think in a logical manner.

I wonder if anyone told you that Covid-19 comes but you’re not even sure when it leaves. Does it leave?

Covid-19 attacked my brain

It might sound strange, but Covid-19 attacked my mind. It didn’t just give me vertigo and fatigue. This illness somehow crushed my concentration and elevated my anxiety simultaneously. As I struggled to put two sentences together, I panicked. For about two or three days, I couldn’t even read a book.

Covid attacked my nervous system

For a while my coordination seemed to be a target of the nefarious illness. It was sometimes difficult to walk. To turn around was a task that took great care, and falling was common. Fortunately, most of the time, I caught hold of something before my descent.

There were nights of strange sharp pains and days of numbness in certain limbs. A couple of times, my eyes twitched. It was as if something alien was manipulating my body, and only when it was done, could I regain the controls. And that is exactly what it does. It takes us wherever it wants to.

Covid-19 is not just an illness

Honestly, I cannot recall moments during that week of sickness that would be neatly pieced together. All I can remember are odd little symptoms and horrific suffocating nightmares. I was frightened, but I’m sure not as horribly frightened as those in the hospital and those who didn’t make it through the illness.

You see, I write this because I want to make sense of it all, but it makes no sense. No other moment in my lifetime have I wanted so badly to reconcile a meaning or focal point. No other illness proved as much to me that it was a living organism than this one. It is.

And it remains

I heard the words, “long Covid”, but didn’t realize what it actually meant. I do now. I still feel like something other than me. My eyes are blurry, and at times, my body moves without intention.

My brain still struggles to make sense of itself, as I write each article that’s due. My clients, my friends, my colleagues, don’t judge me. This illness makes the life of the freelance writer much more difficult than it’s ever been.

As I come to my conclusion, I am relieved. I must work, I must write, day after day, but the illness lingers, I just know it. I feel it in my fingers as they fumble, and I notice the empty moments of thoughts, like misfires.

Unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before, I don’t know when it’s over. Am I better? Is it over? I have no idea.