Coping Without Cocktails: How I Unwind Alcohol-Free

Lessons learned from a career in the fire service

I don’t drink anymore. It has been a struggle but I like to think I am managing well.

I’ve been going for 4 months without a single drop and I haven’t looked back.

That’s not to say there haven’t been struggles along the way.

The hardest times for me, are after difficult days at work.

I’m a Firefighter in a busy city station, and I absolutely love it.

It’s busy, I have a great watch, and I get to feel like I am making a difference.

Sometimes, it can be pretty difficult as you can imagine.

In a way, it has become more difficult since giving up alcohol. My previous method of decompression was to go out for beers after work and talk things through.

The issue with that, it had a tendency to make things worse.

For me, alcohol offered a temporary reprieve from the stress but added to it later down the road.

I have had to find other methods of decompression, without falling back onto booze, and I can’t state how much better I feel for it.

Here are a few strategies I have implemented, which work for me.

Physical exercise

I work out every day regardless of what goes on in my life, but I have begun adding secondary sessions after a hard day to help with my own stress management.

These sessions are rarely taxing, and they are normally one of two things.

The first is a long walk. Normally with a few of my colleagues that I have been with that day. We grab a hot drink and take a walk through the city. We don’t always talk about the incidents we have attended that day, but we just talk.

The other is a trip down to the local leisure centre. Normally we go straight to the swimming pool, but sometimes we hit the gym first. After that, we will spend a good half an hour in the steam room/sauna. This gives our minds and bodies a chance to really relax, and spend some time talking with each other.

What do both of these have in common? We talk.

I know it seems a bit silly but we men normally have a bit of an issue just talking, so we have found ways to do it, whilst doing other things.

Guys, please remember, them little thoughts in your head? You know the ones you think it’s just you having? It’s not just you, others will be having the same thoughts.

It’s hard, believe me, I know, but I am telling you, if you start talking to your mates about stuff you have going on, I guarantee many of them will be able to relate, and will be so glad it’s being talked about.

Solitude

Something I do nearly every single shift is something I never really made a point of happening, it just did.

One morning, I finished working out in my station gym and I went to make myself a coffee.

I went and sat outside on the balcony, and couldn’t help but notice what a beautiful morning it was.

I sat there for nearly an hour, long after I finished my coffee, and it wasn’t until I went to go back inside, I realised not only how long I had been there, but I also didn't have my phone.

The thing is though? I felt great.

I felt calm.

I felt relaxed.

I had just been alone with my thoughts for an hour, without any kind of outside interference and I felt fantastic for it.

I treat it as a form of meditation.

I don’t go out there to focus on my breathing or anything like that.

I go out there just to be with myself.

I don't set out to think about anything. I just want to be.

This is the one part of my day, where I feel okay with not doing anything, as that is its exact purpose, and as time has gone by, I have got more and more okay with setting out time in my day to do absolutely nothing.

I think all of us need to be alone with our own thoughts on a regular basis.

It’s that time we need to rationalise our own minds.

It’s the time we need, just to be present.

Present with ourselves for a change.