avatarChristina M. Ward

Summary

The website content is a personal and poignant free verse poem titled "Consent" by Christina Ward, which depicts the harrowing experience of sexual assault and domestic violence, emphasizing the complexity and destructive nature of such relationships.

Abstract

"Consent" is a raw and evocative poem that delves into the traumatic experience of sexual assault within a domestic violence context. Christina Ward bravely shares her story, illustrating the fear, coercion, and emotional turmoil endured by survivors. The poem conveys the intense vulnerability and powerlessness felt during an assault, with vivid imagery of the assault itself and the subsequent impact on the victim's psyche. Ward also touches on the societal and personal complexities that prevent victims from leaving abusive relationships, highlighting the importance of empowerment and support systems. The piece serves as a call to action, urging awareness and support during National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and reminding readers that healing is a lifelong journey.

Opinions

  • The author conveys a strong message about the need for understanding and empathy towards survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault.
  • There is an emphasis on the emotional manipulation and psychological control exerted by abusers, as reflected in the lines where the abuser blames the victim for their own trauma.
  • The poem suggests that societal attitudes towards domestic violence and sexual assault need to change, particularly in recognizing the strength it takes for survivors to leave abusive relationships.
  • The author's personal note at the end, mentioning her own journey of being away from her abuser for 16 years, implies that recovery is possible but requires time and support.
  • The inclusion of a link to resources for Domestic Violence Awareness Month indicates the author's opinion that awareness and action are crucial in combating domestic violence.

Consent

a free verse poem

Photo by Velizar Ivanov on Unsplash
  • Trigger warning, the following poem depicts a sexual assault. This was a very difficult thing for me to write and to share. Please do not proceed with reading if you feel in any way that this may be too much for you to read.

(Family members of mine — please understand, I share this for healing, and I do this for others to be brave and tell their stories. Please do not read this if it may upset you.)

Consent

Ok, fine, go ahead, I say I know the price if I don’t — tumbling to the floor the enraged tossing of me, mattress and all —

my nightgown the thin veil between us twisting under your weight

my nose bending painfully to the side as you press your nose against mine your eyes so close I have to avert mine to keep your demons from blinding me.

I can feel the rage in your spittle.

I can feel your hatred seething into me, your insatiable need bearing down on me

the fish, just look at the fish swimming in the backlight glow the filter humming plecostomus, guppies, angel fish the gurgle, bubbles, water just look at the fish the blurry-teared visions of oblivious fish

your breath, heaving in my face the weight of you

Stop crying! I can’t do this if you’re crying — you are disappointed with me, disgusted with me

it’s not my fault I married damaged goods, you say, the blacks of your eyes always smile as they curse

The weight of you releasing the bed releasing me to silent, silent breathing the paralyzed listening the waiting for demons

Please, please, please I am praying you won’t wake the children

I sob without sound, knees to my chest when the door closes, you, on the outside of me

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Please understand that these types of relationships are complex, complicated, and very destructive to a person’s mental strength. People leave when they are strong enough. Which is hard to do when their abuser’s main goal is to keep them weak. If someone you know is in an abusive, manipulative, controlling relationship — the best thing you can do is empower them and help them to secure options.

Christina Ward 🍁🌲 is a poet and writer from North Carolina. She has been away from her abuser now for 16 years. It takes a lifetime to heal.

Domestic Violence
Poetry
This Happened To Me
Mental Health
Self
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