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Abstract

hoto by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@jasmineinthewood?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Marika Sartori</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Unsplash</a></figcaption></figure><p id="570d">During four years in graduate school, I shifted from forty bottles of essential oil, designer bags to crazy coupon ladies (regret that I spent too much)? I did all the styles. I never went into debt, but it’s safe to say that every penny was spent by the fifteenth of the month.</p><p id="8215">In a way, I believe spending wisely is a learned habit, and it took me longer and strangely to master the skill. I am not quite upset about the money I could have saved given my learning curve theory. I am even kind of glad that I was a shopaholic on a graduate student stipend, so there was not a lot of room for me to waste anyway.</p><p id="2595">Time wasted is what I regret the most. I can make more money, but I cannot take back the time spent. That’s why I am opening this old wound now in case you are also using shopping as a therapy.</p><p id="4b1a">What contributed to my shopaholic?</p><h2 id="1c4b">Scarcity during childhood</h2><p id="c710">I remember the first time my mom took me to do grocery shopping and told me that I could buy whatever I like to eat. I was already in high school. Previously, we weren’t in great financial shape, so we spent money very carefully. I was always well-fed, but most junk foods were out of option since they were not essentials (is that why I love junk food so much?). The day mom said we could buy whatever I wanted to eat, we filled up more than one shopping cart, which was a first for me.</p><p id="0f04">The graduate stipend was not a lot, but it covered more the basic needs. This time I was not restricte

Options

d to picking whatever food I want; I can buy whatever I want (within that budget.) I bought enough essential oil and other wired stuff to double major in wizardry. I had the freedom to buy whatever I wanted!</p><h2 id="3406">Picking the wrong battle</h2><p id="ba33">The first year of graduate school was not challenging for me. I imagined the life of a liberal arts undergraduate student while what was waiting for me were math-based test banks. That was not what I wanted in graduate school.</p><p id="f0a1">Not getting enough stimulation from school, I should have started learning something on my own, talking to my professors, reading more journal articles. Should have, could have, all the things I am telling my students now.</p><p id="4db7">Instead, I picked up shopping. And “sales” really reeled me in. I never had any experience with discounts, so it feeds my shopping craving while giving me a sense of being frugal! Look at me. Only purchase things on sale!</p><p id="fcb7">Every day I would look around for the best sales. Skincare, makeup, clothes, purses. Anything. Himalayan candle holder? I had four. Never used. Bought on sale. It gave me a strange sense of accomplishment at that time.</p><h2 id="1dab">Fast forward to today</h2><p id="770b">My shopaholic behavior stopped when I graduated and started working. The new environment did the trick, and the shopping addictions phased away.</p><p id="adab">I had a minor relapse a couple of years old triggered by becoming a first-time homeowner. That’s another story for another day. Interestingly, I now find shopping exhausting and a complete waste of time. Went to the other extreme.</p><p id="477c">If you have a friend who spends a lot of time and money shopping, it could be a signal of calling for help.</p></article></body>

Confessions of a Former Shopaholic

As we are transitioning back to normalcy and having greater consumer confidence, I want to confess my past identity — a shopaholic. From a macroeconomic standpoint of view, spending is boosting the economy and contributing to our GDP. However, on the individual level, excessive spending is harmful in many ways and could be a camouflage for other issues.

Ph.D. in shopping?

I was a shopaholic in graduate school. I probably spent more time shopping than studying, which I regret deeply. The classmate I shared an office with reminded me that he thought I shopped too much online, and I ignored the advice.

I was a highly functional shopaholic, so no one bothered to set up an intervention. My parents were in China, so they probably did not know how much time I spent shopping. Even if they knew, they probably wouldn’t do anything since I had good grades and were apparently happy. My husband and my in-laws were spoiling. They would tell me about sales in the malls, drive me there, and turn it into a bonding activity.

During four years in graduate school, I shifted from forty bottles of essential oil, designer bags to crazy coupon ladies (regret that I spent too much)? I did all the styles. I never went into debt, but it’s safe to say that every penny was spent by the fifteenth of the month.

In a way, I believe spending wisely is a learned habit, and it took me longer and strangely to master the skill. I am not quite upset about the money I could have saved given my learning curve theory. I am even kind of glad that I was a shopaholic on a graduate student stipend, so there was not a lot of room for me to waste anyway.

Time wasted is what I regret the most. I can make more money, but I cannot take back the time spent. That’s why I am opening this old wound now in case you are also using shopping as a therapy.

What contributed to my shopaholic?

Scarcity during childhood

I remember the first time my mom took me to do grocery shopping and told me that I could buy whatever I like to eat. I was already in high school. Previously, we weren’t in great financial shape, so we spent money very carefully. I was always well-fed, but most junk foods were out of option since they were not essentials (is that why I love junk food so much?). The day mom said we could buy whatever I wanted to eat, we filled up more than one shopping cart, which was a first for me.

The graduate stipend was not a lot, but it covered more the basic needs. This time I was not restricted to picking whatever food I want; I can buy whatever I want (within that budget.) I bought enough essential oil and other wired stuff to double major in wizardry. I had the freedom to buy whatever I wanted!

Picking the wrong battle

The first year of graduate school was not challenging for me. I imagined the life of a liberal arts undergraduate student while what was waiting for me were math-based test banks. That was not what I wanted in graduate school.

Not getting enough stimulation from school, I should have started learning something on my own, talking to my professors, reading more journal articles. Should have, could have, all the things I am telling my students now.

Instead, I picked up shopping. And “sales” really reeled me in. I never had any experience with discounts, so it feeds my shopping craving while giving me a sense of being frugal! Look at me. Only purchase things on sale!

Every day I would look around for the best sales. Skincare, makeup, clothes, purses. Anything. Himalayan candle holder? I had four. Never used. Bought on sale. It gave me a strange sense of accomplishment at that time.

Fast forward to today

My shopaholic behavior stopped when I graduated and started working. The new environment did the trick, and the shopping addictions phased away.

I had a minor relapse a couple of years old triggered by becoming a first-time homeowner. That’s another story for another day. Interestingly, I now find shopping exhausting and a complete waste of time. Went to the other extreme.

If you have a friend who spends a lot of time and money shopping, it could be a signal of calling for help.