Community Questions Cannabis Convent After Priest’s Stoner Snack

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gan slurring a bit,” said former Deputy Mayor Shannon Culpepper. “I figured it was just a little sacramental wine, but it kept getting worse. It was when he was leading the Lord’s Prayer, and he said, ‘Our father, whose name is Art, lead us not into temtemper tantrums and deliver us bread. I could go for snacks. Anyone else want a snack?’ that I thought maybe it was something more.”</p><p id="2a62">Parishioners were concerned at the unorthodox prayers during Mayor Treston’s wake, but it wasn’t until the priest began stripping out of his vestments and clothing that they took action.</p><p id="2d9e">Witnesses say the kiting clergy managed to get all the way down to his boxer shorts before wake attendees were able to tackle him and remove him from public view. Due to the deceased’s political ties, there were several on and off duty police officers on-hand to subdue the priest who was mumbling about his robes smelling too purple.</p><p id="7a09">Fr. O’Halloran was taken to the hospital where it was discovered he’d ingested the marijuana brownie. After a can of Pringles and a nice nap, the priest was back to his usual, level-headed self.</p><p id="92d1">The incident has ignited serious conversations in both the church and the community about the Cannabis Convent.</p><p id="d738">“If the nuns can get the brownies mixed, who knows what’s next?” said a church member who did not wish to be named. “So the good Father got a pot brownie. Does that mean some unsuspecting blighter got a plain old regular brownie from the dispensary? How are we to know if those gummy crucifixes have the amount of pot promised? These stoner sisters could have been holding out on us the entire time, man.”</p><p id="feb3">Other community members expressed the same sentiments. The Mother Superior attempted to assuage concerns saying, “Our edible cannabis production is as reliable as it ever was. If anything, Sister Mary Janet has a heavy dropper finger when it comes to oil dosing for the recipes. You’ll get as high as Fr. O’Hallor

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an with our edibles, provided you have valid ID and a medical marijuana license.”</p><p id="f95e">The Cannabis Convent dispensary is open Monday-Saturdays except during masses and meals.</p><p id="dba9">For more from the Wonderquill News Network, check these out:</p><div id="d645" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/local-teen-suing-parents-over-terrible-name-spelling-b473401c29e2"> <div> <div> <h2>Local Teen Suing Parents Over Terrible Name Spelling</h2> <div><h3>Claims needlessly complicated name has caused years of trauma</h3></div> <div><p>Wonderquill News Network</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*oTb7vmmK_aXEj9bGO029nQ.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="0211" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/university-students-offer-credit-counseling-for-charity-b5172fc9c948"> <div> <div> <h2>University Students Offer Credit Counseling for Charity</h2> <div><h3>Proceeds to benefit retail trauma charity</h3></div> <div><p>Wonderquill News Network</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*RJe0QvtpkQAMuBH9tQY9Jg.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="15c5"><a href="https://mailchi.mp/a10eefccb1d2/gwennalaithlandemailsubscribe"><b>Click here to get a weekly digest of my favorite articles in your inbox.</b></a></p><p id="49f4"><i>Gwenna Laithland is a writer, launch advisor, and humorist. She is the founder and editor of WonderQuill. She is a work-at-home mom of 3 living in Oklahoma. She writes contemporary sci-fi and is working on her debut novel, Beyond the Sky.</i></p></article></body>

Parishioners angered after brownie mix-up

Enid, Oklahoma- Giving a whole new meaning to wake and bake, Father Colm O’Halloran presided over a wake for a respected community member on Wednesday after accidentally ingesting a marijuana-laced brownie.

St. Dymphnas’ Catholic Church is home to what has been dubbed the “Cannabis Convent.” The nuns work tirelessly to produce medical marijuana products for the community. They run their own sanctioned dispensary and are best known for their effective and tasty marijuana edibles.

Sister Mary Christopher is the Mother Superior and oversees the production and sales. “We typically keep the dispensary and day to day church operation very separate, but when the oven went out in our commercial kitchen, Father O’Halloran was kind enough to open up the church’s kitchen to us,” she explained.

The sister believes one of her fellow nuns may have inadvertently swapped the cannabis brownies with a batch baked without the THC oil. “We wanted to say thank you and leave him a treat in the vestry,” the Mother Superior added.

When Fr. O’Halloran discovered the errant Thank You brownies, he partook as he got ready for the memorial prayer service for the recently deceased former mayor, Timothy Treston.

O’Halloran began the wake service as usual, but as it continued, the THC started to take effect.

“The Father began slurring a bit,” said former Deputy Mayor Shannon Culpepper. “I figured it was just a little sacramental wine, but it kept getting worse. It was when he was leading the Lord’s Prayer, and he said, ‘Our father, whose name is Art, lead us not into temtemper tantrums and deliver us bread. I could go for snacks. Anyone else want a snack?’ that I thought maybe it was something more.”

Parishioners were concerned at the unorthodox prayers during Mayor Treston’s wake, but it wasn’t until the priest began stripping out of his vestments and clothing that they took action.

Witnesses say the kiting clergy managed to get all the way down to his boxer shorts before wake attendees were able to tackle him and remove him from public view. Due to the deceased’s political ties, there were several on and off duty police officers on-hand to subdue the priest who was mumbling about his robes smelling too purple.

Fr. O’Halloran was taken to the hospital where it was discovered he’d ingested the marijuana brownie. After a can of Pringles and a nice nap, the priest was back to his usual, level-headed self.

The incident has ignited serious conversations in both the church and the community about the Cannabis Convent.

“If the nuns can get the brownies mixed, who knows what’s next?” said a church member who did not wish to be named. “So the good Father got a pot brownie. Does that mean some unsuspecting blighter got a plain old regular brownie from the dispensary? How are we to know if those gummy crucifixes have the amount of pot promised? These stoner sisters could have been holding out on us the entire time, man.”

Other community members expressed the same sentiments. The Mother Superior attempted to assuage concerns saying, “Our edible cannabis production is as reliable as it ever was. If anything, Sister Mary Janet has a heavy dropper finger when it comes to oil dosing for the recipes. You’ll get as high as Fr. O’Halloran with our edibles, provided you have valid ID and a medical marijuana license.”

The Cannabis Convent dispensary is open Monday-Saturdays except during masses and meals.

For more from the Wonderquill News Network, check these out:

Gwenna Laithland is a writer, launch advisor, and humorist. She is the founder and editor of WonderQuill. She is a work-at-home mom of 3 living in Oklahoma. She writes contemporary sci-fi and is working on her debut novel, Beyond the Sky.