Chuckle Out Loud (COL)
LOL is lonely, it needs a companion: a micro-pondering
Today I proclaim to humanity that laughs out loud, commonly known in the ether as LOL, an internet acronymic celebrity, is hilarity-centric and therefore marginalizes we chucklers of the world. I rarely project the seemingly incontrollable belly laugh, or even out loud laughter able to be heard across a room. Contrarily, I commonly chuckle under my breath or sometimes in decibels decipherable by near-standers. Thus, in the spirit of the sensitivity climate pervasively dominant in our current existence, I am compelled to extol atop the online mountain, “I am not a laugh out louder, I am a chuckler.”
LOLoneliness
Let’s face it. Being the most overused internet-based shorthand is hard, unrewarding work. It’s lonely. No one truly understands what it’s like to be the top dog, not even the second-tiered WTF, BTW, or ISO. Even if one of these also-rans reached the status of co-top dog, it would just be a coldhearted peer, a mere competitor, to LOL. LOL is the Michael Jordan or Tom Brady of this 0 or 1 programming world. But what if a relative, a cousin if you will, climbed to the pinnacle alongside LOL. No one would question its legitimacy. Yes, yes, LOL would feel insecure sharing the space with COL but only at first. Eventually, this champion of champions, even when the competitive juices flowed, would be comforted by having an equal. Let us not forget the magical Magic and high-flying Bird needed each other to be at their best.
The Movement
Humanity has always needed inspiration, a movement, to galvanize the populous. Or maybe a distraction during difficult times or from those in power solidifying their grip. “Hey, less influential peeps, pay attention to this internet acronym over here rather than noticing our power grab over there.” It’s inevitable. And if inevitable, I advocate for the ever-lurking chuckle out loud to have its day. No longer will the COLs of the world be shamed or placated. Stand up, COLs, chuckle out loud with pride and equanimity. And I implore the LOLs, please support our movement of fairness and inclusivity. Extroverted LOLs and introverted COLs have more in common than differences. Join the movement. Once and for all, let bellowing joy walk hand-in-hand with whispering amusement.
Conclusion
LOL + COL = peace on earth.
