Christmas, the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Summary

The article criticizes the excessive waste and consumerism during the Christmas season in the U.S., suggesting that the resources spent on unnecessary gifts could be better used to address global issues like world hunger.

Abstract

The author of the article expresses a critical view of the environmental impact and consumer culture surrounding Christmas in the United States. They highlight the massive amount of waste generated from non-recyclable wrapping paper and unwanted gifts, as well as the irony of spending on frivolous items while global issues like hunger persist. The article points out that the money spent on holiday shopping in the U.S. alone could cover the cost of ending world hunger for a year, emphasizing the disparity between the excess of the holiday season and the needs of the less fortunate. The author advocates for a more conscious approach to holiday spending, urging readers to consider the broader implications of their Christmas purchases.

Opinions

The author views the U.S. Christmas season as an "annual environmental disaster," characterized by excessive waste from gift wrapping and decorations that cannot be recycled.
They mock the commercialization of Christmas by listing absurd and unwanted gift items that are popular in the market, implying that these items contribute to needless consumerism.
The article suggests that the money spent on such items during the holiday season could be put to much better use, specifically citing the cost to end world hunger for a year as a more worthy cause.
The author takes a firm stance against the societal expectation of giving and receiving gifts, stating their preference to not participate in the exchange of "wacky and weird" items wrapped in "razzle-dazzle."
They express a desire for a Christmas celebration that focuses on meaningful actions rather than material possessions, with the goal of making a positive impact on the world.

NOT!

It’s mid-December, and here in the U.S., we’re getting started with our annual environmental disaster. “The world’s greatest,” according to so many sources it would take an entire article just to list them all.

We’ll go shopping and wrap up presents in nearly five million tons of shiny sparkly trash — well, it starts out as wrapping paper, but much of it is trash on December 26 since it cannot be recycled. We’ll use so much pretty ribbon that we could tie a big bow of it around our entire planet to celebrate this most wonderful — wasteful — time of the year. We’ll buy 2.65 billion Christmas cards, and we’ll put the nice ones on the mantle, but by January they’d be just gathering dust up there except that they’ve already been tossed in the garbage.

And the presents themselves? Would you believe the average Christmas shopper — whom I’ve read would rather get wacky and weird stuff than anything they actually need — is shopping for the likes of:

A resin orange tabby cat with a hole in the … um … so you think your tissues have been used even before you grab one to blow your nose

An inflatable full-size camouflage-painted tank pool float, or if that cannot be found, an inflatable full-size brown cow

A blanket that looks just like baked beans

Bacon-scented or rum-and-coke-flavored lip gloss

A six-pack of soda in bacon, ranch dressing, and buffalo wing flavors, which if anybody gives it to me is going to immediately wind up in the closest landfill

Even more bacon boffo: bacon bandages (not really, but they sure look it) and a pillow that sure looks like a huge slice of greasy raw pig

A pillow in the shape of your girlfriend’s … (is butt short for buttocks?) and a Barcalounger-sized pillow imitating an overdone sourdough loaf

A fake beer belly, fake electrical outlets, a fake tongue, and fake shit — yes, do-do — to put on your toilet seat

And speaking of toilets: “the original” toilet nightlight; a “rainbow” toilet bowl nightlight; a miniature plastic frog on a toilet; fake toilet paper, which you can’t use because you can’t tear it; and toilet paper with the shittin’ image of Donald Trump smilin’ on each sheet

a box with a picture on the outside of something nobody in their right mind would want that you can put one of these other items in, which nobody in their right mind would want

Oh, and last but not least, a harness and leash for your chicken

But it’s Christmas. You gotta have gifts. Right?

Not me. Don’t you go spending your hard-earned money on wacky and weird wrapped in razzle-dazzle and try to give it to me. Don’t be putting a big red bow on something I’d rather not have. And don’t send me a card with a reindeer with a flashlight embedded in its nose or a fat man in a red wool suit sweating on a SoCal beach.

Do you know how much money it would take to end world hunger, not just for Christmas but for a whole year? $37 billion. This year, in this country, we will spend more than $940 billion during the holiday season. That’s 25 times the cost of seeing to it that every child in the world goes to bed with a full tummy. Every night. All year.

Feeding the world. Now that’s my idea of a Christmas present!

Please comment, highlight or clap (up to 50 times). You can also:

Thank You!