Chapter 1 of Pride and Prejudice
…as retold by Chat GPT
In today’s world, it is widely recognized that a financially well-off single man is often seeking a wife. Even if the thoughts and intentions of such a man are initially unknown upon his arrival in a new community, the local families firmly believe that he is a desirable match for one of their daughters.
One day, Mrs. Bennet approached her husband, Mr. Bennet, and exclaimed, “My dear Mr. Bennet, have you heard that Netherfield Park has finally been rented out?”
Mr. Bennet replied that he hadn’t heard.
“But it’s true,” she responded, “Mrs. Long just visited and informed me about it.”
Mr. Bennet remained silent.
“Don’t you want to know who took it?” his wife impatiently asked.
“You want to tell me, and I’ve no objection to hearing it.” That was enough of an invitation.
“Well, my dear, you must know that Mrs. Long says a wealthy young man from the north of England has taken Netherfield. He arrived on Monday in a fancy car to inspect the place and was so delighted that he immediately struck a deal with Mr. Morris. He will take possession before Christmas, and some of his staff will move in by the end of next week.”
“What is his name?”
“Bingley.”
“Is he married or single?”
“Oh, single, of course! A single man with a substantial fortune — he earns $250,000 a year. What a great opportunity for our girls!”
“How so? How would it affect them?”
“My dear Mr. Bennet,” his wife replied, “how can you be so uninterested! You must understand that I am considering the possibility of him marrying one of them.”
“Is that his intention in settling here?”
“Intention! Nonsense, how can you say such things? But it’s quite possible that he might fall in love with one of them, so you must visit him as soon as he arrives.”
“I don’t see the need for that. You and the girls can go, or you may even send them by themselves, which might be better. After all, you are as attractive as any of them, and Mr. Bingley might prefer you.”
“Sweetheart, you flatter me. I may have possessed beauty in my time, but I don’t claim to be extraordinary now. When a woman has five grown-up daughters, she has to stop thinking about her own looks.”
“In such cases, women often have few looks left to think about.”
“But, honey, you must go and see Mr. Bingley when he arrives in the neighborhood.”
“I can’t promise you I will do that.”
“But think about our daughters. Just imagine what a great match it would be for one of them. William Lucas and his wife have already decided to visit solely for that reason. Normally, you know, they don’t bother with newcomers. You have to go because it will be impossible for us to visit him if you don’t.”
“You’re being extremely particular. I’m sure Mr. Bingley would be delighted to see you. I’ll even write a few lines for you to say that will assure him of my wholehearted approval for him to marry whichever of our daughters he chooses. Of course, I’ll put in a good word for my dear Lizzy as she is my favorite.”
“You’ll do no such thing. Lizzy is no better than the others, and I’m certain she’s not as beautiful as Jane, nor as good-natured as Lydia. But why do you always favor her?”
“None of the others have much to recommend them,” he replied, “they’re all foolish and ignorant, just like other girls. But Lizzy is more clever than her sisters.”
“Mr. Bennet, how can you talk about your own children in such a manner! You take pleasure in irritating me. You don’t show any sympathy at all for my delicate nerves.”
“Now hold on here. I hold your nerves in high regard. They’ve been constant companions for a long time. You have mentioned them by name for at least twenty years.”
“Ah! You don’t really have any idea what I endure.”
“Whatever. I just hope you’ll recover in time. Perhaps you’ll live long enough to witness the arrival of many young men with fortunes of $250,000 a year in our neighborhood.”
“It won’t be any good even if twenty such men come, as long as you refuse to visit them.”
“Rest assured, Pumpkin, that when there are twenty, I will visit them all.”
Mr. Bennet was a peculiar blend of intelligence, sarcastic humor, reserve, and unpredictability. Even after twenty-three years of marriage, his wife didn’t fully understand him. Her own mindset was less complex. She had limited understanding, little knowledge, and an unpredictable temperament. When she felt dissatisfied, she said it was her nerves. Her life’s purpose was to get her daughters married, and she found comfort in social visits and lots of gossip.
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I hope you enjoyed reading what Chat GPT did with P&P. What do you think Jane Austen would have said about it?