avatarjanny’s heart

Summary

Janny reflects on the recurring cycle of hope for change and the harsh reality of unfulfilled expectations in her relationship, amidst personal and emotional challenges.

Abstract

The article "Cha Cha Cha Changes" delves into Janny's emotional turmoil as she grapples with the persistent hope for improvement in her relationship during weekends, which consistently end in disappointment. Despite moments of tenderness and declarations of love from her partner, the relationship remains fraught with pain and unmet promises of change. Janny acknowledges the deep-seated sorrow and the weight of shared history, including overcoming obstacles and facing life-threatening illnesses together. The article conveys her struggle to let go of the past and move forward, as well as her yearning for a love free from suffering. She questions whether they can truly come together and withstand external pressures, despite the lack of clear reasons for their enduring connection. Janny's musings reveal a kind-hearted, sensitive individual with an untamed wild streak, inviting readers to share their own experiences.

Opinions

  • Janny expresses skepticism about the prospect of genuine change in her relationship, despite her partner's assurances.
  • She feels that the emotional pain is deeply ingrained, comparing it to Greek tragedies and describing it as a scalding, searing sensation.
  • There is a sense of resignation as Janny contemplates the possibility of never escaping the cycle of hope and disappointment.
  • Janny's partner's words and actions initially give her hope, but the recurring pattern of unfulfilled promises leaves her disillusioned.
  • She reflects on shared experiences of tragedy and illness, which have both brought them together and driven them apart.
  • Janny reveals a desire to escape the pain, even fantasizing about a fairy tale-like resolution to their struggles.
  • She questions the divine purpose behind their relationship, acknowledging the lack of an obvious reason for their pairing.
  • Janny identifies herself as kind-hearted, sensitive, and possessing a wild streak, suggesting these traits are central to her identity and her approach to life and relationships.

Cha Cha Cha Changes

Photo by Jannys Photos

Weekends are brutal

Happens every time

Always hoping it will be different

Yet no changes. No sign

I thought it would be better

This much I know is true

Don’t think change its a-comin'

Hot tears sting deep inside my crippled soul

You said things had changed

Since that first fateful day

With a different tone in your voice

Swearing to live your life a whole new way

That day you opened your eyes

The first raspy words I heard were, Jan, I love you

Thought we would share a special, sacred place

Obstacles we’d survived in every crack and space

We weathered those storms

They were harsh, and they were cruel

Unrelenting day and night

Like random shots in the dark skies

I don’t know what happened

Maybe we came to our senses

Tragedy brings you together

With sorrowful consequences

Your days they were marked

From your very first one

Thought life-threatening illness

Could take you and sail away

Not many Greek tragedies

Could stand toe to toe

Will you ever be able to move forward

And let that shit go

I dreamt late at night

Changes are blowing our way

Then the monsters came a-callin'

Took all those hopes and dreams away

It cuts like a knife

Scalding and hot

Deep searing pain

History deep in your heart

Put down that baggage

God told me one day

It doesn’t belong to you darlin’

You can’t make it go away

Some days I want to huff and puff

And blow this house down

Like in the wizard of oz fairy tale

Put on my red shoes and dance on

I’d gladly take you with me

If my wish of all wishes came true

Take away that pain and suffering

It calls out sadly, whispering, screaming to stay

That voice embraces you

Gives light to your fire

Doesn’t leave room for Jan I love you

It just sets us ablaze

I stay Lord knows why

He surely put us together

No rhyme and no reason

Can we hunker down

And let no man put us asunder

Janny’s heart, musings, and meaningful meanderings! Sharing my love, pain, joy, and suffering. Could tell you a thousand things about me but what’s important is that I’m kind-hearted, sensitive, and have a wild streak that can’t be tamed. These are the things that drive me! What about you? Share your thoughts, comments, or ideas below or send me an email at [email protected]

Photo by Patricia Clark
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