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Abstract

.Gary Chapman explained this human trait in The Five Love Languages. Required reading for any husband. Interested in a successful marriage.According to Chapman, each of us expresses and receives love in five different ways. Quality time. Physical touch. Words of affirmation. Acts of service. Gift giving.Everyone has a primary language. A way we prefer to give love. And get love. Understanding our desired means is important. Understanding our spouse’s love language is essential.Nobody is great in all five. But Dad best be fluent in the one that counts most, our wife’s love language.<h1 id="fc39">Mother’s Day Garden</h1>For years, I ventured out of NYC on Mother’s Day weekends. My Mom and I spent hours working together in her yard. She loved tending to the many gardens around our home. Nurturing the flowers and shrubs. Since us four kids no longer needed nurturing.One year, we created a Mother’s Day garden. Picked a nice patch of land in the front of the house. Cleared out weeds and brush. Raked up leaves. Added some topsoil and mulch. Even plotted out a stone path through the middle.Then we headed to the local nursery. For their annual Mother’s Day sale. We filled up the car. Azaleas. Rhododendrons. Hydrangea. Lilacs. Lilies and Irises.Took me all day to plant everything we bought. An exhausting day. But a wonderful outcome. Which I cultivated each Mother’s Day thereafter. Till she passed in ’99.That was my Mother’s Day gift. An act of service, actually. The way I show love. And

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hers, as well.I’ve created gardens here at our house, too. Growing special flowers my wife enjoys. Especially Peonies. Sadly, don’t bloom till after Mother’s Day.About a month from now. In time for her… birthday. Whoa. Note to self.<h1 id="17ee">Celebrating Mom</h1>Some Dads are aces at gift-giving. They’re creative. Imaginative. And plan ahead. Way to go.The rest of us need to improve. Or find a viable alternative.Fortunately, words are an ideal means of celebrating Moms. And available to any Dad. Any time. No need to race to the local nursery. Or card store. Doesn’t require a reservation. Or cost a dime.We can be generous with our words. Praising our wives. Especially in front of the kids. Call out the things she does well. Taco Tuesdays. Homemade meatballs. Stocking favorite desserts. Picking outfits. Clothes that actually match. Haircuts. Holiday decorations. All the housework goes unnoticed.Demonstrating our love and appreciation in words is simple. Yet, impactful. And every Dad can speak up. We’re all aces at that.Hugs work, too. From us. And the kids. Big, I-appreciate-all-you-do type squeezes. Or simple, I-love-you embraces.Today is special. Mother’s Day. A shout out to all Moms. And a terrific opportunity to do something memorable. Celebrating her with the kids.But us Dads can do better. Than just this one holiday. With a smidge of extra effort, we can show Mom how much we care. Every day. All year long.Go, Dads. Go.</article></body>

Celebrating Moms

Dads’ Survival Guide: Partnering — Our Marriages

Mother’s Day.

That’s today. Yikes. Better get on it. A quick, Spring flower arrangement. Cards from the kids. Breakfast in bed. Brunch reservations. At her favorite spot. Or any spot that’s available. On such short notice.

For those of us Dads who don’t plan well, these are the last-minute, holiday scrambles. To show our wives how much we care. Which is ironic. Because if we wanted to show her how much we truly cared, we’d have planned better.

My bad.

Pretty much par for the course. On gift-giving. For me. Valentines. Anniversary. Christmas. Birthdays. I’ve been so pitiful over the years; my wife has given up. Instead, I’ll suggest she buys what she likes. Let me know. And we’ll call it a day.

Pathetic.

Fortunately for me, the point of Mother’s Day is not the gifts. It’s the celebration. Of Moms. Recognizing all the energy and effort every Mother puts into child-rearing. Sacrificing her own needs. Day after day. To care for the littles. And ensure they have all that’s necessary. To thrive and flourish.

A round of applause for all Moms.

Oh, wait. Hold on. Mother’s Day means our Mom, too. Ugh.

Love Languages

Gift-giving is not one of my love languages. As my wife will attest.

Gary Chapman explained this human trait in The Five Love Languages. Required reading for any husband. Interested in a successful marriage.

According to Chapman, each of us expresses and receives love in five different ways. Quality time. Physical touch. Words of affirmation. Acts of service. Gift giving.

Everyone has a primary language. A way we prefer to give love. And get love. Understanding our desired means is important. Understanding our spouse’s love language is essential.

Nobody is great in all five. But Dad best be fluent in the one that counts most, our wife’s love language.

Mother’s Day Garden

For years, I ventured out of NYC on Mother’s Day weekends. My Mom and I spent hours working together in her yard. She loved tending to the many gardens around our home. Nurturing the flowers and shrubs. Since us four kids no longer needed nurturing.

One year, we created a Mother’s Day garden. Picked a nice patch of land in the front of the house. Cleared out weeds and brush. Raked up leaves. Added some topsoil and mulch. Even plotted out a stone path through the middle.

Then we headed to the local nursery. For their annual Mother’s Day sale. We filled up the car. Azaleas. Rhododendrons. Hydrangea. Lilacs. Lilies and Irises.

Took me all day to plant everything we bought. An exhausting day. But a wonderful outcome. Which I cultivated each Mother’s Day thereafter. Till she passed in ’99.

That was my Mother’s Day gift. An act of service, actually. The way I show love. And hers, as well.

I’ve created gardens here at our house, too. Growing special flowers my wife enjoys. Especially Peonies. Sadly, don’t bloom till after Mother’s Day.

About a month from now. In time for her… birthday. Whoa. Note to self.

Celebrating Mom

Some Dads are aces at gift-giving. They’re creative. Imaginative. And plan ahead. Way to go.

The rest of us need to improve. Or find a viable alternative.

Fortunately, words are an ideal means of celebrating Moms. And available to any Dad. Any time. No need to race to the local nursery. Or card store. Doesn’t require a reservation. Or cost a dime.

We can be generous with our words. Praising our wives. Especially in front of the kids. Call out the things she does well. Taco Tuesdays. Homemade meatballs. Stocking favorite desserts. Picking outfits. Clothes that actually match. Haircuts. Holiday decorations. All the housework goes unnoticed.

Demonstrating our love and appreciation in words is simple. Yet, impactful. And every Dad can speak up. We’re all aces at that.

Hugs work, too. From us. And the kids. Big, I-appreciate-all-you-do type squeezes. Or simple, I-love-you embraces.

Today is special. Mother’s Day. A shout out to all Moms. And a terrific opportunity to do something memorable. Celebrating her with the kids.

But us Dads can do better. Than just this one holiday. With a smidge of extra effort, we can show Mom how much we care. Every day. All year long.

Go, Dads. Go.