Can We Talk About Queer Breakup and Heartbreak?
A Prism & Pen writers prompt
One of my best friends (who is one of the founders of Prism & Pen) is a transgender man going through heartbreak. His first love just broke up with him, and his pain has been wrenching to observe even from a distance. He’s hurting bad, and I’m doing my best to support him, but I can only do so much.
His pain is compounded because he’s closeted by practical necessity. Most of the people in his daily life are very homophobic and transphobic. He can’t share important truths about his relationship and how it ended. Reaching out for support is really tough when reaching out means sharing only a sliver of his truth.
I lived that personally!
When my partner Lenny died in 1999, I was beyond bereft. I’ll never forget my first (or was it my second?) day back at work. I was sitting in a client’s conference room doing contract work. His firm was small, he was the boss, and we had clicked, both of us former Marines.
After lunch, he came in and sat down beside me. “You need to talk about anything, Jarhead? You look like your best friend just died.”
“Actually,” I stuttered, “Um … my, my, um, … my wife died last week.”
I’m not proud I decided to stay closeted to him, but that was a personal choice based on a lot of factors, not least of which that I couldn’t afford to lose his business and I had no idea if I could trust him.
He was very concerned and kind, but because I didn’t feel I could share my truth with him, he couldn’t offer (and I couldn’t accept) genuine support. We never talked about the subject again.
Can We Talk About Queer Breakup and Heartbreak?
That’s our new Prism & Pen writing prompt! Whether you’re “Out and Proud,” a newly cracked egg, or closeted by real practical need, do you have stories to tell about coping with loss and heartbreak? Maybe you can share how your chosen queer family rallied around you? Maybe you can tell warming stories about the genuine support and love you received from cis/straight friends and family.
- If you feel cut off (at least in part) from grief support because of your queerness, what strategies do you use to stay healthy?
- If you’re a family member, friend or ally, have you supported queer folks through loss and heartbreak? Have you noticed any particular challenges?
- If you’re a young person in the developed world, does this conversation seem odd and outside your experience? Wanna talk about it?
Also, what am I missing? What am I not seeing about this topic that would be fascinating to write about?
It’s time to tell some stories!
Quills out, editorial support available! Even if you don’t think of yourself as a writer, P&P editors can help you make your story look sharp and professional.
Remember please, you don’t have to submit stories to P&P based on our prompts. You can submit stories about anything in the LGBTQ universe, whenever you like. Please do!
You tell your stories, we’ll help you share them.
Please send in your essays, poems, short fiction, memoir, or history. Don’t forget film, TV, and art reviews.
If you’ve not yet written for P&P, here are our submissions guidelines and procedures:
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