Can I Please Vent About The Mom Who Brought A Baby To A Rave?

No, really, I want to know how this even happened.

I’ve started to notice something very alarming about American society. Far be it for me to say this, but there’s a growing percentage of the population that just does not want to grow up.

I mean, not for nothing, but even I’m growing up. I got married, got three cats, started tending to a small garden, and also am working on getting my finances in order. Wee! Right?

Well, yes. Yay for me. I’m powering through adulthood. Now, I just wish a lot of the people I read about in the news would do the same thing.

Recently, a woman made international headlines for bringing a baby to a rave.

This was part of a public Facebook post that involved a raver who brought a 10-month-old baby to a Zeds Dead concert. Now, just in case you’ve been living under a rock, I’ll explain what’s wrong with this:

• Zeds Dead is a very bass-heavy electronic duo. Speaking as someone who has cats with sensitive ears, bass can be very rough on sensitive ears. We put our cats in a separate quiet room whenever my husband practices spinning his DJ sets. The fact that this woman brought a KID to a RAVE and thought ear plugs would be enough? Nuh-uh. I’ve worn plugs in my ears and still had tinnitus for hours after. That poor child might have permanent damage.
• Far be it for me to say this, but raves have really bad quality air for kids. Have you been to a rave? People smoke things. A lot. Depending on the venue, it can be anything from weed and cigarettes to PCP and meth. Bringing a baby to a place where weed, meth, and PCP could be in the air is low.
• The baby was being jostled around. People were bumping into it. Can someone say “Shaken Baby Syndrome?”
• One dude spilled beer on the kid. Yeah, I don’t think that’s how a kid’s first drink should go. Somehow, I just feel like 10 months old might be a bit too young.

In other words, this shit was not acceptable and beyond immature. If you have a kid and want to rave, have a friend babysit. You can still party from time to time, but you need to leave the kid at home.

You know…away from the fucking drugs, loud noises, and shaking that comes from flopping around like a fish on a goddamn dance floor.

This moment is something that needs to have authorities and bar staff involved.

I’ve worked in the underground rave scene before. I modeled for rave clothing before. I’ve done go-go dancing for raves when I just turned 18. My husband’s a DJ and most of my exes are party promoters.

Now, I’m going to point something out here. If any of us saw a woman trying to enter a rave with a toddler, we would have barred her entry. Some of us would have gone so far as to call the police or CPS on her.

What’s wild about this is that most of us are what typical people consider to be immature, unreliable, and overly youthful. How is it that we would have called the police and barred entry, yet the local venue didn’t?

Where the hell were the doormen? What were the doormen thinking? “All ages” does not mean you let a drooling, crying toddler into a goddamn, motherfucking rave!

Moreover, I’m willing to bet that there was at least one person who acts as a mandated reporter in that building. Whether it was a teacher, a nurse, a doctor, or an undercover cop doesn’t matter.

What matters is that no one fucking stopped that woman and said, “You need to step outside, we have to report you.”

Why is there no investigation being done on this venue? Whose bright idea was it to let a woman with a baby into a rave?

This is my PSA for the week.

If you are pregnant and don’t want to abort, that’s fine. You can have a child. If you are under the impression that you can take your kids to drug-infested places or try to headbang with the kid at 10 months old, that is not fine.

The hardest part of being a parent is recognizing when you have to be an adult for your kid. If you are not capable of making decent decisions for yourself and a small child, consider an open adoption.

A baby is not a toy. It’s a living creature with a lot of needs — some of which you may not even be aware of when you first get knocked up. There is no shame in admitting when you’re outgunned here.

In many cases, people know when they are not parent material and I have a feeling this girl knew this was not the best thing for her. Seriously. Do not keep a kid with you if this is how you are going to treat them.

There are plenty of qualified, literally CPS-certified parents who are desperate for a child of their own. Sometimes, the best thing you can do for your little one is give them the parenting that you yourself cannot offer.

Is it easy? No. But it’s the most mature and benevolent thing to do for all people involved.