TRAVEL & THE MAGIC OF FRIENDSHIP
Camino de Santiago, German Guy from the Black Forest Wins My Heart
He became one of my best friends on Camino Frances
Sam was a tall man, nearly 7 feet, I’d guess. He had dark hair, huge amber eyes, and wore dark orange pants. He was perhaps thirty, and walked alone.
I’d see him glancing my way at the bars all along the Camino. For a few days, we didn’t talk, but by destiny some people are meant to be friends. This was the case for us.
It wasn’t a love interest, although he was good looking. I’m a firm believer that anyone can be a friend. We don’t need to “shop” our social class and gender to find a companion.
Age shouldn’t be a roadblock either. The kind of men I like feel the same way, but maybe I’m wrong. I have friends who say women can’t really be friends with men, unless the men are gay.
That men always have a relationship, even if just a fleeting one, on the mind. The jury may be out for perpetuity. I love men, and have some as friends along with a few women I’m close with. As I’ve gotten older, I’m pickier about who I spend time with, to be honest.
Mostly, it’s me, my husband, and a lot of animals on the farm here in Oregon. When I travel, I usually get on a plane alone and have some sort of experience! Often, it includes meeting friends here and there along “The Way,” by which I mean the Camino de Santiago in Spain.
There are more than a dozen routes for the Camino — the pilgrimage that most often ends in Santiago de Compostela. Camino Le Puy, Camino de La Plata, Camino Madrid, Camino Norte, Camino Invierno. Many, many routes. I am writing about Camino Frances.
Travel Companions
Some people hit it off while traveling , and I love it when you find someone you get along with. I’ve made a few mistakes inviting people to travel with me. One woman did a major road trip with me. When we were first in my car, I asked her, “which do you prefer, driving or navigating?”
Her response — “neither.” Oh, I see. So for the next thousand miles, I’ll be doing all the work. Okay.
We made the agreement that she would purchase “every other” tank of gas, and once out of Oregon, you have to pump your own. She would roll her eyes and be angry at having to do this chore every 400 miles. She sulked for the first fifty miles on a tank she pumped.
Her stops on the trip included gift shops. I preferred to stop at little tourist attractions, or the “biggest boulder” this side of the Mississippi. That kind of thing. It was a culture clash!
And she slept in late, until 9 or 10 a.m., which was torture. On a road trip, early mornings are my favorite time to drive.
I learned a lesson.
Traveling with others is hard if you don’t have certain ‘travel values’ in common
- Flexibility is a must. If the restaurant doesn’t have what you want, can you bounce back fast, or are you going to be a pain-in-the-ass about it?
- Hours of sleep and time getting up come into play. If you’re someone who must have ten hours of sleep, how are we going to get a late dinner in Spain, where restaurants open after 9 p.m.? and how are we going to have breakfast if you’re sleeping in until 8?
- A helpful and friendly personality is crucial. If someone needs a bandaid or has a hard time communicating in a 2nd language, can you spare a minute to be kind?
- Can you laugh about cultural miscommunication instead of complaining? Listen and understand how a different culture does things? One thing I’ve noticed in markets in Spain is you aren’t supposed to touch fruit or vegetables. Here in the USA, we know to tap a melon for juiciness, gently feel a peach, and rotate apples around checking for bruises. Don’t do that in Spain! You have to be willing to watch and learn.
Sam was a good travel friend for me, and we occasionally walked together and had meals together over the course of a week or so. I learned a lot about him!
He had a warm laugh, and great English language skills.
His feelings about the Catholic church were about the same as mine. He was irritated the pope was planning a year of forgiveness for women who had abortions.
“He has no business forgiving the women. It’s their business,” Sam said, In fact, we should leave women alone with that. They’re the ones that have babies.”
He was annoyed I mentioned it. Not at me. He was annoyed thinking of people judging others. Most specifically, it was not the pope’s business to judge!
I loved hearing his opinion.
Camino de Santiago brings kindred people together fast. I was friends with a pair of American women too, and I loved bringing all the friends together. We were happy to meet up in Burgos for a dinner out.
In Burgos, and in many cities, large curing hams were hanging from the tall ceilings of the restaurant. We had red wine in huge wineglasses, and plates of delicious food. We laughed and chatted and had such fun!
This restaurant is on “the main drag” in Burgos, and pilgrims on the Camino are going to walk right by it. We walked right in and got a beautiful table, near the very front window.
Imagine my surprise this morning when I discovered it’s a Michelin Guide restaurant. The reviews online for this place are great. Apparently, the morcella — a blond sausage — is one of the specialties.
I mostly remember the delicious red wine and the laughter of my companions, and the stories.
Oh, sigh! We had such a great time there.
The beauty of walking as a pilgrim is finding places like this to gather with friends you’ve met. To raise that glass of wine and order something interesting on the menu and share it, in bites or slices, with friends.
Cheers, and Buen Camino!
If you liked this story, here is a collection of Camino stories and anecdotes you may enjoy. Thanks!
