By All Means Stop Dead In Your Tracks… But I Will Punch You

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your tracks apropos of nothing? Now, sure, it’s absolutely your right to do this… but I retain the right to barrel straight into the back of you, screaming ‘MOVE OUT OF MY WAY OR I’LL KILL YOU!’</p><p id="e87f">A gentle psychological nudge that should get the hypothalamus pumping.</p><p id="23ef">I live in London, we’ve got zero time for dithering. To survive here you need to stay aligned with the direction of travel. So here’s what you need to do… Go with the flow of pedestrian traffic, then gently slow down and join a contraflow when an opening is available.</p><p id="691c">Under no circumstances do the ambulatory equivalent of an emergency stop and under absolutely no circumstances do this on Oxford Street.</p><p id="793b">The rest of us aren’t psychic and more importantly, we don’t give a shit whether you’ve left your purse at home or not. We do give a shit if we have to embark on evasive action and dart around your obliviousness. I have done it far more than I care to mention and saved the NHS buckets of cash… but I’m putting my flipper down. Enough is enough.</p><p id="7c3a"><b>I hereby reserve the right to get exasperated and punch you firmly in the back of the head.</b></p><p id="aa25">This article was a little aggressive… prefer to talk about Micro-Aggressions? I’ve got a story just for you.<

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/p><div id="5748" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/we-need-to-talk-about-micro-aggressions-4389d92e25b4"> <div> <div> <h2>We Need To Talk About Micro-Aggressions</h2> <div><h3>And then when we’re done talking we never need to mention them again.</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*fPHh_jRIm0vwFfhH)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="a04d" class="link-block"> <a href="https://argumentativepenguin.medium.com/membership"> <div> <div> <h2>Join Medium with my referral link - Argumentative Penguin</h2> <div><h3>As a Medium member, a portion of your membership fee goes to writers you read, and you get full access to every story…</h3></div> <div><p>argumentativepenguin.medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*P134NzJQ_pbYtvvd)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

January 18th — The sudden stop

Welcome to the Penguin Micro-rants. I have committed to doing a micro rant every day in January. Why? Why not! Today I want to talk about one of my least favourite things, the sudden

Yeah. That!

Stopping at random, not necessarily in text but in person as you go about your day to day life. Look, we’ve all been there, we’ve all got halfway down the road and realised we’ve left something at home. We’ve all had a text that requires us to go somewhere different because a friend is running late.

There are myriad reasons why you’d have to change direction because of some sort of internal decision… but unless you signal that decision to the rest of us then you’re a kinaesthetic liability. If you were a car, we’d take away your driving license.

How much of a moron do you have to be to simply stop dead in your tracks apropos of nothing? Now, sure, it’s absolutely your right to do this… but I retain the right to barrel straight into the back of you, screaming ‘MOVE OUT OF MY WAY OR I’LL KILL YOU!’

A gentle psychological nudge that should get the hypothalamus pumping.

I live in London, we’ve got zero time for dithering. To survive here you need to stay aligned with the direction of travel. So here’s what you need to do… Go with the flow of pedestrian traffic, then gently slow down and join a contraflow when an opening is available.

Under no circumstances do the ambulatory equivalent of an emergency stop and under absolutely no circumstances do this on Oxford Street.

The rest of us aren’t psychic and more importantly, we don’t give a shit whether you’ve left your purse at home or not. We do give a shit if we have to embark on evasive action and dart around your obliviousness. I have done it far more than I care to mention and saved the NHS buckets of cash… but I’m putting my flipper down. Enough is enough.

I hereby reserve the right to get exasperated and punch you firmly in the back of the head.

This article was a little aggressive… prefer to talk about Micro-Aggressions? I’ve got a story just for you.

Penguin Micro-Rants

By All Means Stop Dead In Your Tracks… But I Will Punch You

January 18th — The sudden stop

We Need To Talk About Micro-Aggressions

And then when we’re done talking we never need to mention them again.

Join Medium with my referral link - Argumentative Penguin

As a Medium member, a portion of your membership fee goes to writers you read, and you get full access to every story…