Burnt Biscuits and the Feminist Agenda

There’s this story making the rounds on Facebook right now, you’ve probably seen it, it’s popped up in my timeline at least three different times. It is a “heartwarming” tale told by a son about the good ol’ days of his youth when his momma used to make breakfast for dinner on occasion.

Well, this story centers on a particular night, momma had a long, hard day at work, and she accidentally burned the dinner biscuits. Little junior watched as his momma sat a plate of “eggs, sausage, and extremely burnt biscuits” down in front of his daddy.

Little junior was amazed when his daddy ate the biscuits, even though they were burnt, and didn’t say a word. After dinner, when little junior was flitting off to do whatever kids back then did in the evenings, he heard his momma apologize to daddy for burning those biscuits. He was absolutely flabbergasted when his daddy responded, “honey, I love burned biscuits every now and then.”

Now, little junior is thrown for a loop because all his biscuit-eating notions are smashed, so he goes and asks daddy if he meant what he said about loving burned biscuits. The wise daddy replied:

“Your mom put in a hard day at work and she’s real tired. And besides — a little burned biscuit never hurt anyone!”

Oh, little junior learned such a lesson that day! He learned that you have to accept each other’s faults and be understanding in a relationship…and just go ahead and eat the burned biscuits every once in a while.

Yeah.

After I finished reading this little story, my eyes rolled so far into the back of my head they are still stuck back there. I went to the comment section (always a mistake) thinking I would laugh along with all the other snarky comments I was sure to find. But no. That is not what I found at all. The comment section was just hundreds of comments, mostly from WOMEN, talking about what a good dad little junior had, and wasn’t little junior lucky to see his dad be such a good husband.

Uh, what??? Momma had a hard and tiring day at work. Daddy knew it. Junior knew it. Yet! Neither one of them offered to make dinner or at the very least grab some takeout so momma could rest for five minutes. Daddy and little junior didn’t even MAKE THEIR OWN DAMN PLATES. And daddy is the good guy in this story?

So, I asked the question, no one else had apparently thought about, “Why didn’t daddy just make the dinner?”

Ah, well that riled those ladies up a bit. They responded in number, telling me I missed the point, that momma probably liked cooking after a long, hard day, that if daddy cooked dinner there would have been no lesson for junior. And my personal favorite:

“This is not about women’s rights. This is not about your ‘issues’ with gender roles. This is about a man being kind and respectful and loving. Then teaching his son to be the same.”

No, sweetie, it really isn’t.

Regardless of my “issues with gender roles” (and I have a few), this story isn’t teaching anyone to be kind. Kind would be having a spouse that recognizes the tired look in momma’s eyes and tells her not to worry about dinner tonight. Kind would be a son that knows his momma worked hard all day, so he sets his own plate and maybe even makes hers. Kind would be a wife that doesn’t feel the need to apologize if she accidentally burns something.

Daddy knew his wife had a hard day at work, but he didn’t help her with dinner. He simply sat down and waited for her to put a plate in front of him, and now daddy and junior want some kind of fucking medal because they suffered and ate a burned biscuit without berating momma for screwing up.

AFTER HER LONG HARD DAY AT WORK.

Ugh. I’m willing to bet dinner wasn’t all momma did that evening either. I’ll go out on a ledge and say she also washed the dishes, helped junior with homework, made everyone’s lunches for the next day, tucked junior into bed, did a load of laundry, and faked a headache at bedtime.

Junior learned the wrong lesson that day. He learned that it is the wife’s job to make dinner and wait on the menfolk, even if she had a particularly tiring day at work. What he didn’t learn was that in a truly loving and respectful relationship, you pick up the slack when your spouse is tired or had a bad day.

Daddy recognized that she was tired, he just didn’t care enough to do anything except “suffer” through his terrible dinner and gloat about what an amazing husband he was after.

It isn’t about a feminist agenda. Honestly, all it comes down to is that daddy is a bit of an asshole. And a shitty husband.

And I sincerely hope that momma burned those biscuits on purpose.