Build the habit first

Summary

The article emphasizes the importance of starting with small, manageable habits to ensure consistency and build towards larger goals.

Abstract

The article argues that the key to successfully building habits is to start with goals that are so easy they seem almost ridiculous. Instead of aiming for 1,000 words a day, one should commit to writing just 100 words daily. Similarly, instead of long meditation sessions or extensive gym workouts, the suggestion is to start with as little as 2 minutes of meditation or 15 minutes at the gym, three times a week. The rationale is that by setting the bar low, the ego's resistance to starting the habit is minimized, making it easier to stick to the routine. As the habit becomes ingrained, one starts to feel good about it, which in turn makes the activity enjoyable and sustainable. The article suggests committing to these tiny habits for a week initially and then possibly extending to a month, without increasing the goal until the habit is firmly established. The key elements in building a habit include making it ridiculously easy, committing to a short initial period, establishing a specific time and place, and, if possible, practicing the habit daily.

Opinions

The author believes that dreaming too big can hinder the process of habit formation, as the grand vision can be intimidating and lead to procrastination.
It is suggested that the sense of accomplishment from consistently performing a small habit is more valuable than the occasional achievement of a larger, more daunting goal.
The article posits that the ego plays a significant role in preventing the start of new habits by providing easy excuses, and that setting very small goals can help circumvent this issue.
The author advocates for the importance of making the habit a daily practice, as it reduces the likelihood of postponing it.
Consistency in performing the habit at a predetermined time and place is emphasized as a strategy to solidify the habit.
The article implies that enjoyment and positive feelings towards the habit naturally develop over time as a result of consistent practice, which further reinforces the habit loop.
The author shares personal experiences, such as writing a book proposal in one-hour daily increments and publishing short articles daily, to illustrate the effectiveness of the approach.
The concept of "Motivational Judo" is introduced as a method to overcome internal resistance and maintain momentum in habit formation.

Build the habit first

You can listen to an audio version of this article here.

We all have habits that we’d like to build. We want to go to the gym three times a week, we want to meditate 20 minutes a day, or we want to write 1,000 words a day.

As is usually the case, we dream a little too big. The vision of that dream gets in the way of making it a reality.

These sound like modest goals, but they’re actually big and scary. They’re just big enough that excuses are easy to make. We’re kinda tired, so we’ll go to the gym tomorrow, or we don’t have time to meditate this morning.

The Pressfieldian Resistance is too much, and the excuses we make protect us from feeling bad about not building the habit. So, the habit never gets built.

The problem is that building the habit itself is an accomplishment. Writing 1,000 words for one day, in itself, is another accomplishment.

Your brain can only handle so many accomplishments at once. When you start bunching them together, it makes it easy for your ego to hide, like a wounded monkey in a tree, far from the tiger’s reach.

The solution is to build the habit first. You have to set a ridiculously modest goal, and make a modest agreement with yourself:

Write 100 words a day for one week at [this time and place] each day.

Go to the gym 3 times in one week on [these days and times], for 15 minutes each session.

Meditate for 2 minutes a day for one week at [this time and place] each day.

This works because you’ll feel ridiculous if you make an excuse that you can’t write 100 words. Your ego isn’t that good at hiding. It’ll be like a grizzly bear behind a bamboo stalk.

But something happens as you start to build your ridiculously easy habit. You start to feel good about it. When you feel good about it, you start to enjoy it. When you enjoy it, it’s easy to do.

Once you’ve finished a week, you may decide to do a month. Keep your ridiculously modest goal. Don’t raise your goal until the habit has been built.

Notice these important elements of building the habit:

The habit is ridiculously easy.

You’ve only agreed to a week at first (because that’s ridiculously easy), and you’ll do a month if that works out. You have no way of knowing if the habit will serve you beyond that.

You’ve pre-established a time and place to perform your habit. This makes it harder for your habit to slip away.

Whenever possible, make the habit every day. If it’s every day, it’s harder to put it off.

When I wrote my latest book proposal, I committed to one hour a day. When I get back into meditating, I make it 5 minutes a day. I recently published a 500-word Medium article every weekday morning for two months.

Don’t let your dream of the ideal habit hold you back from having a habit. With a little Motivational Judo, you can hold The Resistance at bay, let your ego pass by safely, and build the habits of your dreams.