Broken? There is Value in the Pieces
Learning how to move on from broken experiences and dreams
Too many of us throw away the baby with the bath water, when it comes to failed life experiences. But there is value in every person we relate with, every life situation and environment we engage with.
Imagine a precious beautiful porcelain vase high up on a shelf. The vase represents the things you desire or have in life. A great marriage, status, success, beauty, a high flying job, health, successful ministry and more.
You admire the vase, it is a wonder, your goals, dreams — achieved or not yet to be. Now imagine that exquisite vase falls to floor and shatters. The dream is broken, pieces scattered on the floor. We start our journey here knowing six simple truths.
1. Knowing Nothing is Immune from Breaking
There is no certainty in life. A stunning 30 year old intelligent young woman is paralysed from neck down, a spinal injury from a freak car accident; a 56 year old man lost his son to a drug overdose, a hard-working honest and godly single mother visits her only son in prison. The vase is breakable.
2. Knowing the Breakage is Sometimes not in Your Control
The vase breaks and the pieces are scattered. Sometimes, the world does not give the explanation you so desperately want to hear. You may have to live in a world where you caused the failure. But why or how the vase breaks does not change the fact that the vase is broken and there are pieces.
3. Knowing You are not Broken
Remember the porcelain vase? High on the shelf, you looked at it proudly and loved it. But you are NOT the vase. The dream or the ‘achievement’ may be broken, but you are NOT broken. The vase represents something valuable, yes. Something precious, yes. But you are much more than the vase. You may have broken dreams, scattered pieces, but you are NOT broken. your body may be broken, your marriage broken, but you are not broken.
Give yourself a minute, stop and say it aloud, “I Am Not Broken.”
4. Knowing That the Pieces Remain
Go back to the vase, where did you leave it? Right where it fell, smashed into hundreds of pieces. The pieces remain right where you left them. They do not suddenly disappear, they have not been swept away. The pieces are not the vase, but you have them. You have not lost everything. You have everything that made the vase exist in the first place.
5. Knowing the Pieces can Be Identified
Here is the core truth. The pieces are the building blocks of the vase. They are the things you put in to create the vase — tenacity, hard work, intelligence, love, generosity, faith … These are not destroyed, they are still there, lying on the floor, perhaps, fragmented, yes, but still there.
What are your pieces from the shattered dream? — write them down. Did you use any ‘bad’ pieces? Selfish ambition, pride, lies as we created those vases.
6. Knowing there is Value in the Pieces
You can gather the pieces in hope, or in despair. The choice is yours. Here is why you should gather the pieces in hope. You can:
- glue them back together - it’s clearly damaged, not quite the original, but good enough.
- take the pieces to someone who can fix it - make it as good as new.
- make something different out of the pieces - a new beginning.
- sell the pieces and buy something else.
Smile again
Broken vases could sometimes present an opportunity for a fresh start. As you identify each broken piece, remove the impurities, the mistakes. Gather again, but this time choose the pieces you want. Separate out the aspects that were not right and be intentional, be hopeful. Build again.
