Bring Me On Down to My Happy Place
Laying down in a field of dandelions makes me feel at peace
“Everyone has a happy place, the scene that comes into view when you close your eyes and let your mind transport you to the dot on the globe where life is cozy, safe, warm.” — Sarah Jio
When I read the prompt from Ravyne Hawke, I immediately felt drawn to share my happy place.
4 years ago, I decided to take a suggestion from a therapist to participate in EMDR therapy.
If you aren’t aware of what this is, EMDR is Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing.
It was developed by Francine Shapiro in 1980 as a form of psychotherapy to release stress and association with traumatic memories in your life.
Because I explained to the therapist all of my past childhood traumas, and I’d been to many therapists yet was still hanging onto all of this trauma, she suggested EMDR.
She said I was a perfect candidate for the therapy and she was very experienced with aiding in the process.
After my few initial visits with her, I accepted her suggestion to try the therapy and she gave me some homework before the next session when we would begin.
First, I had to create a box, figuratively and literally. Ok, go home and make a cute box, got it.
And second, I needed to find, think of, and pick a happy place. It could be anything or anywhere I wanted, just as long as I could picture it with my eyes closed.
She encouraged me to make a list and then decide. I followed her lead and went home to ponder what my box would look like and where my happy place would be.
Why did I need these two things?
You need a safe, calm, and peaceful place to think of after you revisit your moments of trauma. She told me to think of it as my emotional sanctuary.
Revisiting a safe place when feelings of unease come up, or when you are stuck back in that place of trauma, is a helpful coping mechanism.
When thinking and revisiting horrible memories, the box comes in as a useful technique for letting go of those traumas that are holding you back from living your best life.
Trauma weighed me down for many years and I was ready to release all of those horrible memories from my childhood.
Sometimes it’s even embarrassing to admit that, in my 40s, I still was hanging on to things that happened to me before I was even 10 years old.
She reassured me that I wasn’t unique. Many people hang onto these childhood traumas their whole life.
I was doing the right thing by coming in to participate in this act of release. It was the first step to healing.
During my ponderings about my box and happy place, many things came up. I wanted to bury these memories deep, for good. They’ve wasted so much space in my creative brain and I needed room for the good stuff!
What would my box look like?
My first thought, I wanted it to be a well. A big ditch where I could throw my baggage into and bury it.
Where is my happy place?
I imagined myself lying in dandelions at my favorite park. It was tucked away deep down in a park that was encapsulated by concrete. You would never know this place existed from the parking lot.
You traipse through dirt and mud, walk down many stairs, and finagle your way through the brush to reach this beautiful space.
I laid down with my eyes closed, imagining how peaceful I was laying amongst the flowers and trees that lined the hidden park.
I smiled and felt at ease.
It was my first thought of my happy place and it was the one that stuck in my mind, even after pondering many places like the beach, the mountains, and different lakes.
Even though all my family and friends in my life make me so happy, I imagined myself there alone. I believe I needed to be alone to process and free my mind of the trauma.
I felt alone when I was going through difficult times so it only makes sense to release all the negativity alone, in my happy place.
Back to therapy
My first session was revisiting traumatic memories. We started with only a few, the big ones. The specific flashbacks that would come and go throughout my whole adult life.
While you bring up traumatic events, you watch a light with your eyes back and forth, engaging in rapid eye movement.
We targeted some of my worst memories, a few times, and then it always ended with me putting that memory in my box and going to my happy place.
Each time I laid on my back and pictured myself in that field of dandelions. It was so peaceful, the sun was shining, and there was a light breeze flowing over my body.
I successfully let go of many memories because of EMDR, writing, and going to my happy place.
I mean, who doesn’t let their worries wash away while laying in a bed of flowers?
I always come back to my happy place when I am feeling down or out of sorts.
Thanks to these wonderful editors of one of my favorite publications: Diana C. Spyder Ravyne Hawke and jules
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Thanks for reading!
Much love, Michele
