Summary

The author recounts their journey with Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (BJJ), from falling in love with the sport upon moving to Singapore, through a transformative relationship that included significant weight loss and competition achievements, to being forced apart due to the Covid-19 pandemic.

Abstract

The narrative begins with the author's introduction to BJJ in December 2011 after relocating to Singapore, guided by their previous instructor's recommendation. After an expensive trial session with a World Champion, the author found a more community-oriented school in Little India. The school's communal spirit and the motto "Leave your ego at the door" resonated with the author. Despite initial challenges and a steep learning curve, the author's dedication to BJJ led to significant personal growth, including weight loss and increased self-belief. This commitment culminated in participation and success in various competitions, including a bronze and a silver medal at the World Cup. The author's BJJ journey was further enriched by training with inspiring figures like Tho Vu and sharing the experience with their son. However, the Covid-19 pandemic disrupted this journey, leading to a forced hiatus after the author contracted the virus from a training partner. The author emphasizes the emotional toll the illness took on their family, especially their wife, who had to care for their newborn daughter. As of October 2021, the author remains apart from BJJ, focusing on family safety while eagerly awaiting the chance to return to the mats and pass on their passion for the sport to their children.

Opinions

The author has a deep appreciation for BJJ, viewing it as both a sport and a martial art.
The initial attraction to BJJ was its focus on skill and technique, as demonstrated by the smaller yet highly adept Shi Hao.
The author values the community aspect of BJJ, emphasizing the supportive environment and friendships formed.
Consistency in training is highlighted as a key factor in the author's transformation and competitive success.
The author draws inspiration from other BJJ practitioners, such as Jason, Shi Hao, and Shane, as well as their instructor Tho Vu.
The experience of competing is described as humbling and highly beneficial for skill development.
The author expresses a strong sense of responsibility and concern for their family's well-being during the pandemic, prioritizing their safety over personal desires.
Despite the enforced separation from BJJ, the author maintains hope and looks forward to a future where they can re-engage with the sport and introduce it to their children.

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu — My Love — October Competition.

Falling in love, relationship, transmitted disease and being apart

Falling in love

It all started in December 2011 when I moved to Singapore. I used to do a different martial art before, which had zero Singapore presence. Before the move, I asked my instructor what to choose instead. His reaction was instant ‘Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (BJJ)!’. Of course, I decided to follow his advice.

The same day I landed, I went to a nearby school in the CBD (Central Business District) and told them I’d like to try BJJ. They gave me a free trial, a private class with a World Champion. He was a nice knowledgeable guy. However, the school fees were high and they only offered a one-year contract. I asked for some time to think about it.

I googled more and I found another school, which had a self-explanatory name ‘Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Singapore’ and was located in the middle of Little India this time. I simply checked their website for the schedule and showed up. They had 2 back-to-back classes that day. I showed up before the start of the first class.

When I came in, I saw two guys on the mats. A 100kg Caucasian man named Jeff and Shi Hao, a 50kg Chinese teenager. They didn’t pay any attention to me. They were ‘rolling’. Rolling, or grappling, is sparring without using strikes, such as punches or kicks. When one of them won the fight, the other tapped to show surrender and they restarted. For an hour, almost non-stop with a few short water breaks. Their casual training was a beautiful demonstration of endurance and skill.

That was it, I wanted to join and learn this martial art right on the spot. My previous experience of martial art classes included a lot of shadow fighting, striking bags and pads, and of course conditioning. We could have a couple of 3-minute rounds of actual fighting at the end of a 1.5-hour class.

I joined the second class, which started with the instructor and about 15 students. They were renting a time slot in a dance studio back then. Students had to put mats on the floor before the class and remove them afterwards. The fees were 2.5 times lower than in the first school I tried with monthly payments. The school’s motto was ‘Leave your ego at the door’ and it all felt like a great community of dedicated people.

Relationship

“There is no losing in Jiu-Jitsu. You either win or you learn.” — Carlos Gracie

I loved the training, it was fun and humbling. The instructor, a Chinese Singaporean named Jason, showed us different techniques. But most of the time we just rolled, and we rolled a lot. The above-mentioned teenager Shi Hao tapped me at least 10 times in a row every class. Most of the time I couldn’t even register his moves. The guy was at least twice smaller than me and he was very technical and super fast. I kept training.

Consistency was an easy thing for me as I came from another martial art. I was 20 kg overweight when I started BJJ. 9 months later, being 33 years old, my weight returned to the time when I was 19. I felt different, very different, and I started believing in myself. A lot of students in our school were attending and winning competitions so I thought maybe I should try that as well. That was something unthinkable for me before. I joined my first competition in February 2013 in the Philippines.

The competition was even more humbling than the training. I felt like one competition fight was worth at least one month of training. It was a huge boost to my skill and motivation. The more I competed, the more I wanted to improve. I met a lot of people from BJJ circles in Asia and became friends with some of them.

I started winning more medals in higher-ranked competitions and the appetite came with eating. There was an instructor from another school named Shane who became a World Champion twice. Inspired by his story, I decided to train for the World Cup myself. I went there in 2015 and came back home empty-handed. Came back in 2016 and managed to win a bronze medal in my weight class and a silver medal in the absolute weight class.

I kept training everywhere I went. My biggest inspiration in BJJ is my instructor Tho Vu, who runs Kimura BJJ Saigon. I had the honour of training with him when I lived in Saigon, Vietnam. He teaches primary school kids for his main job, so he can explain everything to everyone. We used to train our small kids, my son Anton and his daughter Amelie together when our kids were 2–3 years old. We are still friends.

Transmitted disease

The Covid pandemic came to where I lived with my family in March 2020. The total lockdown lasted for 2 months, of course, BJJ schools closed down as well. After a 2 months break, I was happy to rejoin the classes. Anyway, I was healthy and eager to go back to training, so what could happen? Due to the ongoing pandemic, we were assigned a single training partner to roll with.

One day, my partner didn’t show up. The next day I had a high fever and started feeling worse every day. Turned out my partner was tested positive for Covid-19 and he had to stay home with some light symptoms. My case got serious and I had to be hospitalized after one week. I had to spend 8 days in a hospital and my wife had to take care of our 2 small kids in the middle of a pandemic. Our younger daughter Adriana was just born in May 2020 so she was 1 month old when I got sick. My wife Rose is a strong woman and I love her a lot but I do realize it was a terrible experience for her. Luckily, my friends and students helped her back then and I’m grateful to them.

Being apart

I’ve been away from the mats for more than a year now as I’m writing this in October 2021. I managed to get back in shape without returning to BJJ but I still miss it a lot. It would be too much of a risk for my family to go and train again until the pandemic is over. So I’m waiting, waiting to be back again. I miss it and hope to get back one day when it’s finally safe. At least to train my kids to learn this beautiful sport and martial art, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.

Thank you for reading my story about my love for Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu! It tells about our falling in love, relationship, transmitted disease and being apart. Hope you enjoyed it!