Summary

The author reflects on their personal journey, shaped by their relationship with their father and the impact of their parents' divorce, leading to a transformation in their life.

Abstract

In a candid narrative titled "Boy Oh Boy," the author delves into the complexities of their identity, heavily influenced by their father. Following a tumultuous divorce that left the author, an only child, navigating adolescence without direction, they found themselves emulating their father's less favorable traits, including a duplicitous nature and difficulty with emotional intimacy. The author describes a rebellious phase post-divorce, characterized by a defensive attitude towards relationships, which they eventually overcame after meeting their husband. Despite the challenges, the author acknowledges their father's rags-to-riches story as an inspiration and expresses a deep, yet complicated, love for both parents. The piece concludes with the author recognizing the psychological scars from their past but emphasizing personal growth and the decision to confront, rather than ignore, these formative experiences.

Opinions

The author identifies more with their father than their mother, adopting both positive and negative traits.
There is a sense of resentment towards the parents' divorce and the subsequent upheaval in the author's life.
The author admits to having trust issues and a defensive mechanism of hurting others before being hurt themselves.
A transformation in the author's life is attributed to meeting their husband, which prompted a change in their behavior.
The author has a complex relationship with their father, viewing him as both a role model and a source of psychological damage.
Despite past issues, the author expresses love for both parents and acknowledges overcoming significant challenges.
The narrative serves as a therapeutic exercise for the author, choosing to address rather than dismiss their experiences.
The author expresses admiration for their father's success story, despite their own "glitches" and struggles.

Boy Oh Boy

I Have Issues (In Response to Sherry McGuinn Mother Prompt)

***Photo of Myself and my Father***

I would love to say I turned into my Mother

Maybe I would just marry a rich man

Oh Brother

Instead, I turned out just like my Dad

Look at this picture

The memories we had

Of course, you can’t rely on me

I’m a victim of the divorce rhapsody

Dad made a few mistakes

I mean shit cut the man a break

I am an only child

After they split let’s just say I took a walk on the wild

No direction. Just a high school freshman.

I got lost at this intersection

Took a detour that led to intervention

Numbing the pain was no exception

I felt very torn when they first split

My mom slapping me across the face telling me, ”You’re just like your fucking father.”

Trust me that’s all it took to turn myself into a martyr

My dad is very duplicitous

Not very good at showing forgiveness

My father has trouble being cozy and cuddly

I’m my father’s daughter

I feel trapped in a cage when a man wants to change me

I also didn’t trust any man

What did I do?

I hurt them

I had a motto

I will hurt you first before you hurt me

I hit the lotto

Exactly

I knew I needed to change my ways.

I met my husband and went through a phase

I figured out how to overcome all the craze

I’m still not good at being warm and fuzzy

I don’t want anybody clinging all up on me

I always admired my dad

Rags to riches

Of course, I had a lot of glitches

You know who The Gorgeous Mess is

I could go on forever and ever

I think it’s time to change the narrative to something more like the weather

Not an easy time in my life

I as well as my father went through a lot of strife

Could cut the tension with a knife

He had to take everything away from me

Afraid I would kill myself a junkie watching tv

I am a bit cold and abrasive

Walk in a room never you will see what turning head’s is

Charm the pants off the room

What they don’t know is I’ve been this way since the womb

Love my parents both very much

My father is my weakness

My clutch

My mom is the other side of the mirror

Better off not to even go there

I definitely picked up psychological damage along the way

Much better now

Lost to

Found my way

I’m glad I decided to write about this

Sometimes it’s easier to turn a blind eye

After all, Ignorance is bliss

Thank you for reading.

Big shout out to Sherry McGuinn I would love to to read more about this prompt. Please click the link below. The best place to start. Thank you. Love you Sherry.

Women, Are You Turning Into Your Mothers?

Take a moment to assess. I’ll wait.

medium.com

Kira Dawn aka The Gorgeous Mess

aka ditto squared

aka Kween

Copyright June 12, 2020. All Rights Reserved.