avatarDarcy Thiel

Summary

The web content details a family's use of CaringBridge, a communication platform, to navigate the challenges of living with cancer, with an emphasis on the support and resources they received through the site.

Abstract

Chapter 5 of the narrative "Bitter & Sweet; a Family’s Journey With Cancer" recounts the Thiel-Colvin family's experience with CaringBridge, an online tool designed to facilitate communication for those facing health crises. Initially skeptical, the family finds the site indispensable for updating friends and family on their journey with cancer. They share updates, photos, and specific needs, which leads to an outpouring of support, including meals, house cleaning, and emotional encouragement. The family also utilizes a Care Calendar to organize assistance, which becomes a humbling testament to the community's willingness to help. The narrative includes guestbook entries that reflect the depth of care and concern from friends, colleagues, and church members, illustrating the power of community and the renewal of relationships amidst adversity.

Opinions

  • The author initially views CaringBridge as an additional task but later acknowledges it as a "sanity-saver" and the best resource they had.
  • The family appreciates the ability to quickly disseminate information and receive support through the guestbook messages, which often brought smiles during tough times.
  • The Care Calendar is described as "invaluable" for coordinating various types of assistance, from meals to transportation.
  • The author expresses humility and gratitude for the community's eagerness to help in any way possible.
  • The narrative conveys a sense of wonder at the rekindling of old relationships and the unexpected help from many directions.
  • The author reflects on the transformative experience of witnessing Tim, their spouse, being surrounded by love and support, much of which is facilitated through CaringBridge.
  • The guestbook entries are seen as a source of strength and a reminder of the impact Tim has had on those around him.
  • The family is touched by the prayers and well-wishes from various circles, including colleagues and church members.
  • The author highlights the unique empathy and understanding shared by those who have experienced similar challenges, such as Chris, who lost his wife at a young age.

Bitter & Sweet; a Family’s Journey With Cancer

Chapter 5

Chapter Five: Cyber-Angel (A.K.A. CaringBridge)

Several people encouraged us to look up this website called CaringBridge. It is designed to help people with chronic illnesses (or other such issues) to communicate with others. It seemed like just another time consumer for me with everything else I was juggling.

After about the tenth time hearing about it, I decided to look into it, if only to be able to tell people I had. Well, it turned out to be the best resource we had. It was invaluable. To say it was a sanity-saver would not be an exaggeration. I only had to send a link to anyone who wanted it, and they could check on the happenings of our lives whenever they wanted. We named it “The Thiel-Colvin Clan.”

  • Saturday, June 5, 2010 7:43 AM

Welcome to our CaringBridge website. We’ve had so many people tell us about this site so we decided to give it a shot. This way you can check up on things at your own convenience. I will try to update this daily… try being the operative word.

We have finally returned home from our vacation. It was fraught with a million unexpected difficulties (like a very expensive speeding ticket and our GPS dying en route without another map in sight), but we still had a great time. Tim felt well most of the trip so that was a blessing.

Tim and Frankie at Colonial Williamsburg; Photo Courtesy of Author

I will try and talk him into letting me put some pictures up on this thing. He gets a bit nervous about putting too much information online. We are desperately trying now to get caught up on things. I still have much to organize but we are slowly making progress. Thanks for all your love and support! End entry.

Not only were we able to get information out quickly, but there is a guestbook as well. People could sign this at any time. These messages ended up being a tremendous support to us. How many times they brought a smile to our faces, just when we thought we were too exhausted to keep our eyes open.

Another tool that became invaluable was “Care Calendar.” I don’t even remember how we found out about it, but a dear friend offered to be the “administrator” for it. It was a website that people could log on to. It was a daily calendar where we could list anything at all that we needed.

This was when people started providing meals for us, cleaning our house, transporting whoever needed it, and anything else we could imagine. People would sign up, and then get an email reminder when it was their turn. In addition, I got emails every day as to who was providing what service for us.

This was yet another most humbling experience for us. All we had to do was ask. People wanted to help in whatever possible way they could.

  • Saturday, June 5, 2010 6:33 PM Guestbook entry from my colleague: Sending lots of angels and healing energy for you and Tim, and your family. You are all surrounded by love and all things are possible. I will keep all of you in my prayers for comfort and healing. End entry

Being a more traditional “talk therapist,” this angel/energy stuff was very new to me and completely foreign to Tim. I had slowly been exposed to it here and there in my field, as well as from family and friends. I didn’t know it yet, but I was about to be catapulted into a journey of exposure about such things.

  • Sunday, June 6, 2010 6:07 AM

Hello all, Still slowly attacking our issues/problems one at a time. Of course, it feels like we start one and add another three! Anyhow, some thoughts about needs — our poor Taffy has been quite neglected (our beautiful Border Collie mix we’ve had for about six months). If anyone likes animals and wants to take her for a walk at the park or creek, or wants to give her a good brushing, let me know!

Also, the gals at my church are having a hard time finding people to help out with cleaning. If you are interested let me know by journal entry or email. (Would anyone actually be interested in such a thing?) Thanks to all of you! End entry

Tim and I made a conscious decision to make our story public. We had come to realize that there were lots of people who wanted to help us, but we had to ask. No one had any clue what we needed, and half the time we didn’t either. But we figured we’d just ask as we thought of things and see what happened. The results were astounding.

  • Sunday, June 6, 2010 7:46 AM Guestbook entry from my friend

Thinking of you and remembering what a remarkable woman you remain and holding Tim and your family deep in my heart. End entry

This woman was my employer turned friend when I lived in Chicago. She was one of those people that invested in you if she found you worthy. So wherever she worked, I went with her. And when she started having kids, I did child care.

I had lost touch with her for many years but during my trip to Chicago for the concert, we were reunited over a lovely lunch. Turns out, she has helped many friends go through the journey I was just beginning to experience.

Everyone knows that most people live a circus-like life. Working, child-rearing, house upkeep, and zillions of other things have our culture in a whirlwind. We had no choice but to recalibrate our lives with this new information. But why would so, so many others CHOOSE to share in this with us?

It is beyond our comprehension.

  • Sunday, June 6, 2010 4:30 PM Guestbook entry from our church family

I think about you all every day… my caring will come in the form of food! A very grandma-like activity. I need to know Frankie’s favorite kind of cookies! With loving thoughts and great concern for you all. End entry

  • Monday, June 7, 2010 6:24 PM

So another day on the roller coaster that is now our “normal” life. Since 8:45 AM this morning I’ve documented 15 phone calls. (I’m sure there were more that I didn’t write down.) Turns out the medical insurance was NOT approved at all.

It was a nightmare day. I truly felt like I might have a heart attack, my chest hurt so badly. In the middle of it, I did take a break to meet with my Bible study chums. Good thing because I had a good cry fest with those lovely ladies…

At 5:00 PM I think we got another final “It’s all ok and approved” message. I hope they are right this time. At 5:45 PM, I got a call from a Roswell “patient advocate.” I explained our situation and also told him I can’t possibly have these kinds of six-hour days fighting with 5–7 entities (literally!), all giving me contradictory information.

I told him I applied for his position last year (obviously I didn’t get it) and I needed a strong fighter. I obviously can do the battling myself but it has taken a great toll on me. He promised to impress me, said he is my new lifeline, and he is the only one I have to deal with from now on.

He also volunteered to come to Tim’s appointment tomorrow morning to ensure it runs “smoothly and perfectly.” I cried again, this time for joy and relief.

  • Monday, June 7, 2010 7:21 AM Guestbook entry from Tim’s friend

Coop, I am looking forward to being there this weekend. My deepest sympathy for you and your family. Be strong and always remember that you are loved. End entry

Jim is Tim’s best friend since childhood. “Coop” has been Tim’s nickname for most of his life. Don’t remember the story behind how that got started, but I’ve grown used to it over the years when Jim comes into town. I remember when Frankie was born and we received a gift in the mail addressed to “Baby Coop.” Thus the name Baby Coop Publishing and the logo is Frankie’s newborn picture!

One of the “sweets” in our lives we are growing increasingly aware of, is the rekindled relationships that form as news of Tim’s diagnosis spreads. Relationships that had been torn apart are being restored. People that had been forgotten are being remembered.

  • Monday, June 7, 2010 4:27 PM Guestbook entry from Tim’s colleague

Hey Tim, Glad we had a chance to chat. You’ve always attacked every problem head-on, so I doubt you’ll approach this differently. You’ve always struck me as a very independent person (aside from being practically useless without Darcy). As you make your way through this, you’ll have to learn that it’s alright to depend on others once in a while.

I’m sure also that you’re going to have the opportunity to see exactly the kind of impact you’ve had on those around you. Perhaps like you never would have imagined. We look forward to seeing you and Darcy again soon.

I’ll keep in touch so we can make it happen. Or should I say, I’ll have my planner meet with your planner. Till next we chat… Take care. End entry

Boy, is he right on. It is an amazing experience to watch Tim see love and support like he never thought possible. It is part of the powerful transformation that is taking shape.

  • Monday, June 7, 2010 7:48 PM Guestbook entry from Tim’s colleague.

Tim, Darcy and family, We have been thinking of you and we wish you well tomorrow. I put you on the prayer list at school, so there are lots of “little ones” praying for you. If we still had Campbell and Briere, it might be US raising the Cup on Wednesday! End entry

Campbell and Briere… former Buffalo Sabres hockey players. Our house has a lifetime full of obsessed, passionate hockey fans. It was a foreign world to me when I first met Tim, but I have slowly begun to catch the fever. This writer was not only a colleague but was one of the season ticket holders with us.

In February, we took a mini-vacation to Toronto to the Hockey Hall of Fame. Don’t know how we had lived that long without having gone before!

  • Tuesday, June 8, 2010 12:55 PM Guestbook entry from Tim’s colleague

Tim, Darcy, and family, If anybody can beat cancer it is you. There’s a lot of people pulling for you Tim. I’ve emailed everyone from the “old days” and all of us are praying for you to beat this thing. End entry

Chris lost his wife at a young age. People do an amazing job of trying to walk a mile in your shoes. But there is some different connection with people who have actually walked the path before you. They get it in ways other people do their best to, but can’t always achieve.

  • Tuesday, June 8, 2010 7:30 PM Guestbook entry from our church family

I got in touch with the Roswell advocate today via email so I am hoping to meet him soon to see if my department can play a part in his care. I am so glad that you guys connected! Hugs and prayers for you all! End entry

She and I work in the music ministry together at church. She also works at Roswell Hospital so she jumps in to help wherever she can in that arena.

Link to Chapter 6

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