HUMOR
Bill Gates Is Getting Richer. That’s A Good Thing
He knows what’s best for us
I was born into a rich family.
Money runs through my veins as my father has a net worth of $126 million. He says that becoming a millionaire is part of my fate. However, my father is wrong because I’m destined to be a billionaire.
How do I know? An old quote says you’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with. And since the average net worth of my inner circle is $3.2 billion, it’s only a matter of time before I join the billionaire class.
Anyway, I want to share some exciting news: Bill Gates is getting richer. Yay! According to figures published by The Guardian, his net worth increased by 31% during the pandemic. It’s also worth mentioning that Elon Musk’s net worth is up 1,016%.
Due to his exponential increase in wealth, Bill has agreed to pay for my family’s country club membership and even invited us on vacation to The Bahamas. I can’t wait. So, to celebrate Bill’s generosity, I’m throwing him a party on Jeff Bezos’ yacht.
Why? As a future billionaire, I am uniquely positioned to plan the most amazing party in the world. It’s also worth mentioning that I’ll be inviting loads of rich people such as Dr. Anthony Fauci, Barack Obama, and Klaus Schwab — Founder of the World Economic Forum.
What’s not to love about that?
At Bill’s party, we’ll discuss fun topics such as lowering the minimum wage, crashing the economy to buy stocks at a low price, and eliminating taxes for anyone with a net worth above $100 million. Trust me — it’s gonna be fun!
Everyone agrees that wealthy people (like myself) know better than everyone else. So, there’s no reason why we can’t decide the future of society. It’s only fair because our collective IQ is much higher than the average peasant.
If you’ve got this far in my article, you’re probably wondering if you can attend Bill’s party and mingle with the elite. The answer is yes. All you need to do is RSVP by leaving a comment, and we’ll send a helicopter approximately three hours before the party is due to start.
Billionaires are getting richer. Let’s celebrate!
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Important Disclaimer: This article is obviously a joke, fictional, and for entertainment purposes only. Please don’t take it seriously. Therefore, it should not be considered business, financial, or any other type of advice.
