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Abstract

<p id="91fc">Losing touch doesn’t mean you didn’t love them or wholeheartedly support them. It just means one or both of you are embarking on a different chapter with different needs and interests.</p><p id="034f">When entering a new phase of life you begin to attract like-minded people who are embarking on that phase as well. You build new connections and those people become a closer constant in your life.</p><p id="213c">I don’t expect my <i>mommy</i> friends to call me for parenting advice because, I’m not a parent. In this time they may be building a closer bond with other parents. When they make plans I may not be the first person they’ll think of and no one should feel guilty about that.</p><h2 id="718c">New goals attract new people</h2><p id="6efb">The people you surround yourself with on a daily basis can help positively impact your goals. If you’re starting a new business, you may start to connect more with other entrepreneurs versus the friends who know all the great party spots. The shift in focus doesn’t mean you didn’t appreciate the fun times it just means you’ve begun to focus on something new. Instinctively surrounding yourself with like-minded people helps you to navigate that next life chapter and we’ve been doing this since the beginning.</p><h2 id="131b">Losing touch doesn’t have to be forever</h2><p id="2387">It’s not always drastic life changes that cause estrangement. Something as simple as conflicting schedules can make maintaining a constant line of communication difficult. When your goals or routines are back in alignment it becomes a whole lot easier to keep in touch should you both choose to do so.</p><p id="d7c1">Some friendships are able to be picked up right where they left off. Keep this in mind before you write-off that friend who moved away and “abandoned” the relatio

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nship. Not everyone has the ability to stay connected during these circumstances and it might not necessarily mean they’re a bad friend. That being said, If one of your values requires more effort from those in your life you may have outgrown their ability to do so and choose to let the relationship dwindle. You shouldn’t feel guilty about that either.</p><p id="1151" type="7">Don’t get me wrong, close friendships are important.</p><p id="f865">Maintaining strong relationships has been a part of our evolutionary process since the beginning of humanity. During our primitive years, If you were unable to maintain a relationship with your tribe you risked losing protection and the chances of survival were small.</p><p id="4243">Now, we may not die of starvation or be eaten by a lion without friends but they still greatly enrich our lives. Bonding with others positively impacts our mental health, allows us to show compassion, and can improve our overall quality of life. That being said, we tend to romanticize the thought of having one constant best friend forever. This type of loyalty can be unfair to expect from those closest to us at any given time, as they embark on their own journeys through life.</p><p id="da94">Best friends may come and go whether we like it or not. Being able to look back at the lessons learned and the beautiful relationships that existed shouldn’t be clouded with guilt or remorse. Living in the now allows you to support and be supported by many different relationships through all walks of life. Cherish the lessons and relationships you’ve built in the past and use them to continue to grow yourself and those around you.</p><figure id="406b"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/1*2CpbKahMGT5OkAtD50Pi3w.png"><figcaption></figcaption></figure></article></body>

BFF - Best Friends For(Now)

Why it’s ok to lose touch

I’ve been a social butterfly for as long as I can remember. I love meeting new people and when it comes to get-togethers, I’m a huge advocate for “the more the merrier”. Throughout my life, it seems I’ve had a revolving door of great friends and great friend groups. However, what I haven’t had is a continuous best friend.

Facebook likes to remind me of this daily with its memories feature. I look back at weddings I’ve stood in and realize I haven’t seen or spoken to the bride in years. Pictures captioned with the title “BFFs” from high school and college contain people who seem like strangers.

Although none of these relationships ended badly, I find myself feeling a little guilty for losing touch.

In the famous words of Blink-182: I guess this is growing up.

When you really analyze these relationships you begin to see that each one served a purpose in your life at a specific time. Your childhood best friend taught you how to relate to people through common interests and favorite snacks, Your high school BFF helped you navigate a brand new world filled with hormones and insecurities. These people were necessary and enriched your life, as you did for theirs.

As you level-up in life, your lifestyle and interests evolve and so do your friendships.

Losing touch doesn’t mean you didn’t love them or wholeheartedly support them. It just means one or both of you are embarking on a different chapter with different needs and interests.

When entering a new phase of life you begin to attract like-minded people who are embarking on that phase as well. You build new connections and those people become a closer constant in your life.

I don’t expect my mommy friends to call me for parenting advice because, I’m not a parent. In this time they may be building a closer bond with other parents. When they make plans I may not be the first person they’ll think of and no one should feel guilty about that.

New goals attract new people

The people you surround yourself with on a daily basis can help positively impact your goals. If you’re starting a new business, you may start to connect more with other entrepreneurs versus the friends who know all the great party spots. The shift in focus doesn’t mean you didn’t appreciate the fun times it just means you’ve begun to focus on something new. Instinctively surrounding yourself with like-minded people helps you to navigate that next life chapter and we’ve been doing this since the beginning.

Losing touch doesn’t have to be forever

It’s not always drastic life changes that cause estrangement. Something as simple as conflicting schedules can make maintaining a constant line of communication difficult. When your goals or routines are back in alignment it becomes a whole lot easier to keep in touch should you both choose to do so.

Some friendships are able to be picked up right where they left off. Keep this in mind before you write-off that friend who moved away and “abandoned” the relationship. Not everyone has the ability to stay connected during these circumstances and it might not necessarily mean they’re a bad friend. That being said, If one of your values requires more effort from those in your life you may have outgrown their ability to do so and choose to let the relationship dwindle. You shouldn’t feel guilty about that either.

Don’t get me wrong, close friendships are important.

Maintaining strong relationships has been a part of our evolutionary process since the beginning of humanity. During our primitive years, If you were unable to maintain a relationship with your tribe you risked losing protection and the chances of survival were small.

Now, we may not die of starvation or be eaten by a lion without friends but they still greatly enrich our lives. Bonding with others positively impacts our mental health, allows us to show compassion, and can improve our overall quality of life. That being said, we tend to romanticize the thought of having one constant best friend forever. This type of loyalty can be unfair to expect from those closest to us at any given time, as they embark on their own journeys through life.

Best friends may come and go whether we like it or not. Being able to look back at the lessons learned and the beautiful relationships that existed shouldn’t be clouded with guilt or remorse. Living in the now allows you to support and be supported by many different relationships through all walks of life. Cherish the lessons and relationships you’ve built in the past and use them to continue to grow yourself and those around you.