Beware of those drag-happy “allies” who thrive on public attention

Summary

The article emphasizes the importance of genuine anti-racism allyship, where white allies must do introspective work and take responsibility for their own racism rather than simply calling out others for theirs.

Abstract

The author, an anti-racism activist, points out the rarity of true allies who not only fight for the Black community but also engage in self-reflection and accountability. These allies acknowledge their capacity to cause harm and actively work to rectify it when it occurs. The article criticizes the performative behavior of some white "allies" who seek praise and recognition by publicly condemning other white people, while refusing to acknowledge their own complicity in racism and white supremacy. The author warns of the danger posed by such individuals who deflect and lash out when confronted with their own biases, often turning on Black individuals who challenge their allyship. The article underscores that real allies are those who commit to both external activism and internal growth, constantly learning from their missteps to become more effective in dismantling racism.

Opinions

True allies are characterized by their willingness to learn from mistakes and apologize when they cause harm.
Performative allyship is problematic; it involves seeking praise by publicly calling out others without engaging in self-improvement.
Every white person benefits from white privilege and must understand their role in systemic oppression.
White people who refuse to acknowledge their own racism and only focus on the racism of others are dangerous and potentially harmful to Black activists and communities.
Cookie-seeking behavior, where white allies are motivated by accolades rather than genuine change, centers their own needs over the needs of the people they claim to support.
Real allies are those who prioritize working on themselves to become better advocates against racism and are open to criticism.
White allies must be vigilant of their motives and avoid causing division among Black women or other marginalized groups.

Most of them refuse to acknowledge their own racism.

I’ve been an anti-racism activist for a while. I’ve encountered many white “allies” who claim to do the work. I talk about them amongst my fellow Black activists. We know true allies are rare — the ones who fight for us and do the internal work to become better allies. They know they’re still capable of harming us. When they do, they apologize and work to repair the damage.

It’s all a learning process. I tell potential allies to stop believing allyship is about perfection. You’re thinking about this work the wrong way. We don’t expect you to be perfect. We do, however, expect you to step up and take responsibility when you cause us harm. Much of your work involves learning from those violent missteps and putting that newfound knowledge to work.

So yes, allies who are actually willing to do this work are rare. I’ve encountered too many white people who think, if they drag other white people to hell and back, it means they’re good allies and we can trust them.

Simply put, we can’t.

They love to publicly bash “bad” white people. These white “allies” repeatedly perform this scene in the hopes that we will witness and then praise their “labor.” They proudly trash other white people as if to say:

“See? I’m not like them. I would never harm you.”

Here’s where the problem lies. If you’re a white person who believes doing anti-racism work only includes dragging other white people, you’re taking the easy way out and ignoring a huge part of what your work actually should look like.

Every white person benefits from white supremacy and white privilege. So every white person needs to do the introspective work of understanding how they play a part in our oppression. Pummeling another white person and condemning them for their racism doesn’t absolve you of yours.

And what exactly are your faults?

These dangerous white people go out of their way to hide the ways they harm us. They refuse to be collected. They deny they have ever done anything wrong. They’re dangerous because they’re willing to lash out when they misstep and deflect from the situation by going after other white people.

It’s like a child who is caught telling a lie. Instead of confessing, they say, “Well, Mary stole a cookie from the jar.” Mary’s actions were wrong. But so were yours. Not acknowledging your own shortcomings means you’re liable to come after one of us when we confront you on your lazy allyship.

I don’t say that as a prediction. It’s happened. Many of us have been on the receiving end when a white person finally shows their true colors and turns on us. Oftentimes, they have chosen another person to fawn over. They will do anything to “protect” their newest obsession. It’s never a healthy situation, and rarely does it end well. Of course, they also love pitting Black women against each other. This is something I will not tolerate.

I will permanently ban you from my circle for that violent behavior.

When white people fight for us, we still must be cognizant of their motives. Many times, they’re cookie seeking. We know that means they’re centering themselves over us. They’re looking for accolades, not change.

Real allies do the external work of collecting their fellow white people. They also continually do the internal work of understanding how they uphold white supremacy and what they can do to change. They are open to the criticism they need to grow. They prioritize working on themselves because, when they’re better allies, they’re better weapons against racism.

If a white person isn’t willing to take an uncomfortable look inside themselves, they’re dangerous to us. It’s only a matter of time before they prove it.

Follow me on Twitter: @LeciaMichelle11