Beliefs: Do You Believe Everything You Think?
You can’t, you aren’t: Negative beliefs are like an invisible force that makes life difficult. But there is another way. We show you how to overcome ingrained thought habits.
Why we shouldn’t believe in ourselves sometimes
Beliefs are a bit like small habits that we have in ourselves: they go unnoticed for a long time. So we don’t question what we’re doing and label it as normal.
Despite all their invisibility, beliefs are still very powerful: they influence what we think, how we feel, and ultimately how we decide: because they are basic assumptions deeply rooted in our psyche that we have about ourselves and life. And that we think are true.
They develop from personal experiences and sayings that we have heard in the course of our lives: in childhood from our parents and caregivers, or in adulthood from friends, partners, or superiors.
These mediated images can influence our perception and thus grow into fixed belief patterns that play out automatically without us consciously noticing.
Beliefs: How to Stop or Motivate Us
Both positive and negative thoughts exist; the former may truly motivate and encourage us to lead the lives we desire. A belief such as ‘I am good the way I am’ is benevolent and gives us courage.
He makes us and what we can do appear in a good light. But even more neutral formulations such as ‘Life has ups and downs and that’s okay’ are attributed to positive beliefs.
Negative beliefs such as ‘I can’t do anything’ or ‘I’m not worth it’, on the other hand, give off a negative self-image of us. One that makes us small and slows us down inside.
Whether it’s about our self-worth or relationships, we all hold on to different beliefs inside — both positive and negative. However, if negative beliefs predominate, they can quite limit our quality of life and prevent us from being authentic.
Negative beliefs: What steps may we take to overcome them?
How much power the trained thought patterns can have over us may give you a queasy feeling. However, crucial information is about to be conveyed: Beliefs do not control us powerlessly. They can be actively addressed, particularly if they obstruct us. Therefore, the first step is:
1. Be aware of your beliefs
By clarifying our inner convictions, we regain power. It helps if we realize that they are just thoughts or a voice in our head.
It may be quite loud because it has long since secured its place in our minds as a long-established pattern — but it is not us, it is not reality.
So, as a first step, go into introspection to get to know your beliefs: Do you have assumptions about yourself and life in general or beliefs that keep recurring? Here it is worthwhile, especially in those situations that are challenging for you, to pause and listen to yourself: What assumptions do you make here, maybe even again and again?
Also, think back to moments when you didn’t feel so well: When do these negative thoughts and feelings occur and do you associate them with a memory from before? Are signal words popping up in your head? Beliefs often contain generalized or absolute statements such as always, never, must, none, etc.
2. Reality Check: How true is the belief?
Once you’ve become a little more aware of your beliefs, take a good look at them: How much truth is there in them? Ask yourself why you believe in them. Are there any past experiences that explain why you feel the way you do about yourself?
They may also have aligned with your previous challenges or experience. Some negative beliefs may have had a positive intention: for example, to protect us from disappointment or pain.
Often, however, we evolve while still carrying around the same beliefs — and these may limit ourselves.
Now ask yourself: Do these assumptions still correspond to your life today? Consciously take your time for this fact check and stay curious about what shows you.
If you have trouble finding enough “evidence” for your inner beliefs, you may take this as an encouragement to refute the belief.
3. Reformulate your beliefs in a positive way
Have your old thought patterns now begun to falter? It’s up to you now to release them. What enables you to do this is the so-called neuroplasticity: the lifelong ability of your brain to change through new impressions and experiences.
That’s quite a superpower that allows us to turn negative beliefs into positive affirmations.
You can think of these as small, encouraging beliefs that help you to restructure your perception and build a positive self-image to find stability within yourself.
It’s not about instilling a “think positively” or giving an unrealistic image like “I can do anything!” — rather, they support us in talking to ourselves more benevolently and lovingly.
When building your affirmation, it is important that it corresponds to your values and that you can identify with it well. Only in this way can you believe and let yourself be accompanied in the process of letting go.
It should be positive, but also realistic and have a connection to the present. Here’s an example of how to move from negative belief to positive affirmation:
- I have to be perfect! → I am enough!
- I can’t do it anyway! → I trust myself!
- First the work, then the pleasure! → I may treat myself!
4. Allow yourself to have new experiences
You’ve come a long way this far! Now it’s time to get out of your head and into active action: Because as important as it is to have found your positive affirmation for yourself, it is also important to practice it in a very practical way on an action level.
This is the only way it can bring about a long-term, sustainable change in your behavior.
Therefore, get ready to get out and have new experiences. What experiences would it take in everyday life to refute your old beliefs? Which experiences can support you in really living out your positive affirmations and anchoring them in your actions?
To do this, you can make agreements with yourself or make small resolutions that lure you out of your comfort zone. What these are is just as individual as your affirmation.
Give yourself the freedom to face new situations and open yourself up to new experiences. In this way, you can grow into a new behavior in which your old beliefs no longer have a place.
5. Be patient with yourself
Now it’s time to practice and be patient with yourself because you have initiated a very important process that takes time. Our brain is a creature of habit and a negative belief that we have carried within us for years does not disappear overnight.
So when you see yourself reverting to your previous views, you don’t need to feel horrible about it. This is also part of it: because as soon as we come into contact with the outside, resonance comes back, which will challenge us in our thought patterns — and perhaps cause us to stumble.
Be kind to yourself in such moments and gently remind yourself that you are doing something you can be proud of. Feel free to think of the process as an adventure that helps you discover your authentic self.
Read also:
Self-Reflection: Using and transforming negative feelings
