Being the Boss of Your Own Life

Listening to your inner authority

The first time I felt like a boss in my own life was when I quit my job and vowed never to allow myself to be so controlled by other people as I had for so long.

This went for all areas of my life too, from work to relationships to friendships.

Some may say I have a problem with authority, and I’m sure in many ways it may seem like this. I have an issue with always putting myself last.

With putting other people first in every single way and finding myself existing as the shell of a person.

Sure this may sound extreme, but It’s genuinely how I have felt after many years working for other people and rushing around trying to fulfill the needs of others.

My wake-up call happened because I kept attracting similar situations in my life over and over and over. It is funny how the universe is right by our side trying to help us and we are so blind to its assistance.

The blindness I think often exists as deep down we know to overcome the cycles we’re going to have to dive deep into some uncomfortable learning.

“The disappearance of a sense of responsibility is the most far-reaching consequence of submission to authority.” ― Stanley Milgram

I decided to delve deeply into the uncomfortable learning.

Taking stock of my life, really seeing the damage I created and participated in. I’m learning to forgive myself for it and learning to release it so I can unplug from my old ways.

This is where I am now. I have unplugged from many of the old patterns of my past. I have asserted my boundaries, learned to listen to my intuition, and let go of people and situations that no longer resonate with me.

It is a quiet still place to be for now, but I know it is the change I was seeking and needing.

The thing I always hated most about authority was the inherent manipulation of power that so often comes with being an authority figure.

When I tried to question or suggest a new way of doing something or a good idea to people of authority in the past I was often met with eye-rolling, underhanded insults, or a quick reminder of just who I was.

This brings me to an important aspect of authority I have experienced in the past. A person of authority that has become overwhelmed with a power complex will often set about to define you as they see you. If you are lacking self-confidence or inner authority (like I was), it becomes a habit that you start living your life through the lens of how other people see you. Rushing around trying to please people but finding yourself comfortable in this place because other people remain unthreatened by you, and you don’t have to take 100% responsibility of your life.

I believe the biggest way we can challenge the status quo is to learn about ourselves and become strong within ourselves so our inner authority is what leads us in life. In spiritual terms for me, this has meant listening to my intuition. Being more mindful and becoming more aware.

It hasn’t led me astray yet(it is an experiment to live like this now), unlike blindly following authority figures has.

When I notice this dynamic resurfacing from my past I am now able to recognize how this can harm me and walk away from situations that aren’t right for me energetically.

I am at a place I can see myself in a more soul-honoring way now. I don’t need people to tell me who I am or where to go or what to do. I am learning who I am and what I have to offer and no one else is allowed to project their definition of me into my life.

I can see that my intuition knows what’s best for me, just as the universe knows how best I can serve others. No individual stands a chance now at making me feel small or putting me in my place.

I am now the boss of my own life and if anyone wants to try and mess with me I will kindly and compassionately turn them away. My own truth is setting me free.

Thank you Diana C for your always inspirational prompts :)!