Being a Mentor Is the Easy Part

Knowing when to shut your trap is the hard part

I belong to several Facebook groups. Some are professional groups, and others are just for my hobbies. Most of the time, when people ask a question, someone that has experience in that area gives some good advice. Unfortunately, this is not always the case.

People can have doubts

I will go out on a limb and say, the best selling point of any community is it being a safe place to learn and receiving support when you are having problems in a particular area.

In many professional groups associated with a paid course, the group comes right out the gate and states that your results may vary. This is the case in any venture.

Look at your graduating class at High School. I am an American, so take your pick of what your basic level of education is named in your country. Everybody receives the same instruction, but the results vary. Some go on to be millionaires, and others end up on the dole.

Much of what you accomplish is how you interpret the material and how you put it into action. Not everybody learns in the same manner. Sometimes, all it takes is somebody to use a different viewpoint to explain something, so you understand it.

So if somebody is questioning the program, the answer is not a flippant three-word response.

Mentorship

You do not have to be Tony Robbins, Christian Mickelson, or Susan James to be a mentor. A mentor is anybody with the skill set you need that is willing to teach you that skill set so you can understand the concept.

If you can not teach what you know, you are not a mentor. You need to connect with people on a level they understand. You need to use words and concepts they understand.

If you expect someone to understand a concept at your level, you have already lost. If they were at your level, they would not need you. They would be searching for someone at a higher level.

As a mentor, you bring people to your level. Once you bring them to your level, you must pass them to the next level. There is no shame in having a student that surpasses you.

As a mentor, it is your goal. You should bask in the success of your students. They stand upon your shoulders as they reach for the next level. That is being a mentor.

You do not know everything

No matter how good you are, you do not know everything. Sometimes all you can do is show someone the direction one should take or who they can ask.

If you do not know, you do not know. Knowing who is the next best thing. I may not know the best way to run a Facebook campaign. In fact, I do not know because my Facebook business account has been suspended. The best thing I can do is refer somebody to a person that is successful in the Facebook arena.

Of course, I could say Facebook is for losers and stay away. That is not the answer. Personally, I do not like the policies of Facebook but thousands, if not millions of people, get great results from Facebook. More power to them. Let them mentor people who want to advertise on Facebook.

I can only point you to successful people on Facebook. I can not mentor people in this area, and as a mentor, I must realize my limits. To disregard somebody’s wish to try Facebook’s platform and to try to get them to go in another direction is irresponsible of me.

Personally, I hope they master the platform and kick ass. Then maybe, they could tell me how to do it.

If you can’t add value, shut your trap

That sounds harsh. Just because you are spouting words, does not mean you are contributing to the conversation.

You may not have the answer, and that is OK. You may have additional questions. That is also OK. Saying something like, “Maybe this is not the place for you” is not OK.

It could be, this is not the place for somebody. But before those words are spoken, there need to be pages of explanation why that is so.

Be a Mentor, or don’t

I do not care how much success you have on your journey to becoming the best person you can be. I do not care if you drive a Lambo or a Honda Jazz. I really do not care how famous or rich you are.

I am happy for you if you are successful. I will help you where I can.

I will not disrespect you or treat you like an idiot just because you do not understand certain concepts as well as I do.

If I do not know the answer, then I don’t. If I can give you a tip where you might find some help, I will point you in that direction.

If I help you be more successful than myself, good for you. Just remember to buy me a beer and tell me about it. If you are really successful, then two beers.

Closing statements

There are a lot of good and helpful people in any community. They can offer you a lot of direction to help you on your journey.

There are one or two that think they are being clever. Do not be discouraged by them. There is no difference between an ass and a successful ass. Both are asses.

If you feel that I am addressing you. Good. When you look at yourself in the mirror tomorrow, ask yourself if you want to be a mentor or an ass.

If you want to be a mentor, take the time and effort it takes to be a real mentor. Anybody can be an ass. Being a mentor is hard work, but the payoff is priceless in the people you help.

Take the time to formulate your answers to every question. It pays off for everybody.

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Originally published at https://pivottowardsfreedom.com on February 18, 2021.