Beau Does Bad Things

The True Story of a Dog-Lover’s Descent into Cat Ownership

A Dog Person and a Cat Person

I have always been a dog person. One of my first memories is before I was three, playing with the lab we had. During my life, I’ve had Newfoundlands, beagles, schipperkes, whippets, a pointer, a basset hound, a boxer, and several Heinz 57s from the shelter.

I love big dogs, small dogs, smooth-haired dogs, and furry dogs. All dogs are good dogs in my estimation. So what did I do? I married a cat person.

I knew my would-be spouse in high school, and he had a cat named Sam. Sam was a big cat, and he was my spouse’s cat. This should have been what they call a clue…yet I was in denial that he was a cat person because he also had a dog.

First Cat — Pixel

I didn’t know how much of a cat person he was until several years into our marriage when he casually mentioned that he missed having a cat. Being a sympathetic person, I put out feelers to see if anyone I knew was giving away any kittens…and of course, one was. My coworker had a litter of barn cats that were ready to be weaned. So that was how we ended up with Pixel, a tuxedo cat named for the eponymous book by Robert Heinlein, The Cat Who Walks through Walls.

Pixel was a great cat for a dog person. We lived in a rural location, and having been born a barn cat, Pixel liked the freedom to roam outside. This suited me just fine…we had fewer snakes, mice, and tarantulas because Pixel kept the pest population in the vicinity down. He’d come in for meals, take a tour of the people, say hi to the dog, and go back out to wander.

We lost him after 11 years.

Storm — Cat Number 2

After we lost Pixel, we lived without a cat for a while until the kids brought home a grey tabby kitten that the neighbors were giving away. We named her Storm because her litter was born close to the same time as a major tornado in Oklahoma.

Storm was another low-maintenance cat. She strolled about the house, ignoring everyone and everything. She lived a very indolent life but got liver cancer after we had her only 8 years.

Serenity, One of Our Current Cats

By now, my spouse has turned the kids cat-crazy. Feelers for unwanted kittens yielded no results, so I started watching Facebook posts from animal shelters. A few days before Christmas, I told the girls we were going for a ride. I had the cat carrier in the car and off we went to the shelter. Once we got there, I told them that part of their Christmas present was a new cat.

As a general rule, I do not recommend getting a pet as a present, but in this case, we were knowledgeable about cats, and it was going to be OUR cat, not a gift for someone else.

The girls looked over all the cats available at the shelter and interacted with them. A sweet dilute calico who had had a litter of kittens stole their hearts. She already had the name Serenity, which worked out nicely since we are big fans of the Firefly series and the movie, Serenity.

Serenity was different from our previous cats. She had a bit of a rocky start since the shelter from which we got her didn’t ACTUALLY spay her (even though they said they did), so we got to learn about the joys of a cat in heat before we were able to get her spayed at the vet.

She is a friendly cat, who loves sitting on laps and purring. Even I, the self-professed dog-lover enjoyed the quiet companionship that Serenity brought to the house once she settled down after being spayed.

So when my spouse called me about a blue kitty he saw at the vet that was up for adoption because his owner had died, I told him that I wanted to go look at him. I LOVE how pretty blue cats are (dogs, too)! In just a few minutes of interacting with him, I decided he needed to come home with us.

Beaumonde aka Dennis the Menace

Beau’s original name was Cooper, but we decided that we should choose a name that went with Serenity…besides he does not look like a Cooper. We chose Beaumonde, or Beau for short, after a haze-shrouded planet in the Firefly universe. At the vet’s, he acted just like Freida’s boneless cat from Peanuts…he just wanted to hang all over you and be carried.

Little did we know that we would soon be saying, “Beau does bad things!” to explain Beau’s charming, but mischievous behavior.

We got our first clue of how Beau would be on his first night in his new home. My older daughter was shining a laser pointer for him, and she ran it up the wall…and Beau RAN up the wall after it. Yes, the cat was literally climbing the walls!

We learned that Beau is more food-motivated than any other cat we have had. Like many Americans, we eat dinner sitting on the couch. Beau thinks this is a fine idea because he will walk right up, and if you’re not paying attention, he will swipe things right off your plate. He is not deterred by being placed on the floor, pushed away, or even splashes of water when he has his eyes set on vittles!

We learned never to leave food unattended with him!

Butter and Beau

This included the butter dish that we used to keep on the counter in the kitchen. Beau loves butter. When we first got Beau, we had a clear plastic butter dish that looked like faux crystal. We had had it through all the previous cats with no issue. Beau found it one afternoon when we were out, and knocked the lid off and ate a whole stick of butter! Beau does bad things!

So we, being smarter than a cat, got a heavy crockery one that he wouldn’t be able to knock the lid off. This one he knocked off the counter and broke…before eating a whole stick of butter. Again Beau does bad things!

Not to be outdone by a cat, we bought a Rubbermaid butter dish that the lid seals on. This worked for a while, but Beau learned to knock it off the counter, and then he wriggles it around with his paws just so he can eat a stick of butter. Beau does bad things…but he’s really clever!

Beau has now trained his people to eat hard butter from the fridge.

So here I am a dog person who is smitten with the antics of a cat…

Did I mention that I’m allergic? LOL