Be The Solution Not The Problem
Release victimhood and reclaim your life
It is inevitable that at some point in life we will encounter things that throw a spanner in the works.
Of course, it is less than ideal when we are faced with challenges and feel ill-equipped for them, but this is the way that life rolls.
It is at this point during our adversity that we come across a crossroads.
What we do at this point will dictate the trajectory of our life for the near future and possibly longer.
There are two options.
We can either stay stuck in a place of wallowing in self-pity, distraught that something has come and shaken up our world.
Or we can acknowledge what has happened and try to work our way through the problem.
It is not the issue itself that defines us, but it is the next action steps we take that do.
Victimhood
If we approach the world from here on out with a victim mentality this will affect so many facets of our life.
It holds us back from being able to take accountability for anything in the future, affects our relationships and we become used to blaming any perceived negatives on external factors.
It’s never good to be in this place. In fact, it is extremely disempowering.
A victim mindset is one of those things that appears to be a helpful coping mechanism; to put the blame onto everyone else and not hold ourselves responsible, and it only provides short-term relief, but in the long run, it is detrimental to our lives much more than we realise.
This causes us to be too hung up on our problems and attached to our pain with seemingly no way out.
However, living in this state for too long means that we will actively not seek a way to solve our issues anymore because we have set up camp in victimhood and don’t see ourselves leaving anytime soon.
This is where mindset shifting needs to happen.
The key factors holding a person in a victim mindset are:
- Lack of accountability
- Attachment to pain
- Inability to look forward
So to get out of this mindset we need to practice the opposite.
Reclaiming our power
We need to be able to hold ourselves accountable for the things that are in our control.
This is not to be confused with blaming ourselves for everything, as there will always be things completely out of our control, but we need to be able to identify where we can take responsibility. This builds strength.
Some people allow their pain to become a part of their identity and wear it on their being like it is a badge of honour.
In a way, this can be a good thing if they have moved past their pain, but allowing this painful event to be ingrained into their identity is not healthy if they haven’t healed.
They will approach every life situation through the lens of their past. This will hold them back from moving forward which is the main goal.
To shed the past we must acknowledge that it happened and we need to make our peace with it. This is easier said than done, but releasing the past will be a massive weight off our chests.
Only then can we begin to focus on channeling our energy into moving forward with the solution.
To move forward means to:
- Learn from the past
- Channel our energy in a beneficial way
- Become stronger
Overcoming adversity isn’t a linear process, but it is one that requires the willingness to overcome it.
The healing and learning process shouldn’t be rushed, but there should be a time limit on how long we allow ourselves to revel in pity because this doesn’t help us in the long run.
The type of people who focus on the solution, and finding ways to move forward are the ones who use their adversity to their advantage and reclaim their power with greater strength.
This is the ideal mindset to be in but it is not always easy and like most things, it is a process, but one that is well worth the effort.
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Thank you for reading!
