Be Shameless, Love Yourself And Eat Anything You Want In Restaurants!
Learn to be comfortable in your skin, ignore judgement and eat what feels good to nourish and satisfy your body.
It can be argued that many of the day to day problems that affect fat people also affect thin people. One problem that thin people definitely don’t have though is everyone judging them when they eat. If a fat person eats something unhealthy the thought is “ look at that no wonder they’re huge”. If they’re eating a salad however it’s “A salad? Really? Who do they think they’re kidding?” As someone who is used to eating as a fat person (I’ve been one my whole adult life), I’ve come up with the only solution….Screw them and their opinions I’m gonna eat what I want and what my body needs! You need to learn to love yourself and eat what you want in restaurants too.
But if you always eat what you want aren’t you just going to have a diet of cakes, pizza and chocolate?
Actually no and studies do back this up (Seriously a quick google and you’ll find lots!) It has been proven, and you should know from your own experience, that telling yourself you can’t or shouldn’t have x, y or z food increases your desire for it. If instead you give yourself permission to eat what you want guilt-free then your cravings reduce. I’m not saying you’ll never overeat again due to your emotional state or because something is really, really tasty but these occurrences should become less frequent. We are born knowing how to eat for our bodies’ needs but this becomes blunted and suppressed by diet culture. This industry makes billions each year telling us we can’t trust our own bodies to know what they need. Feel so angry you want to scream yet?
In a study in the 1920s a group of toddlers was given free rein to eat anything they wanted at any time. The range included everything from ice cream to broccoli. Unsurprisingly on any given day the choices the toddlers made were all different both in when they ate and what they chose. However when taken over the course of the entire study all of them instinctively chose a balanced diet on their own with no external cues whatsoever. If we know at 3 years old what we actually want and our body needs then we still know it now. We just need to learn to trust ourselves.
Ok let’s say I trust myself about food. How can I learn to love myself and eat anything I want in public without being afraid of judgement?
This is something you’ll need to work on but you need to stop caring about what others think. I know it might seem impossible but you can do it! As unpleasant as it can be to be on the receiving end of fatphobia you need to remember it is their problem not yours. You are absolutely entitled to nourish your body in a way that feels right to you and it is nobody’s business but yours! Let me repeat that because it’s important
- What you eat is no one else’s business. They wouldn’t judge thin people and they have no right to judge you.
- You have the right to nourish yourself, eat what feels good and really, really enjoy your food!
- Learning to love yourself is one of the most important goals in everyone’s life. It has been the single most amazing and transformative thing I’ve done with mine!
It may be scary at first but over time you’ll get used to it. I’m fact the biggest surprise you’ll probably find is that nothing happens! I’ve eaten desserts and burgers and pizza and fries and pastries galore in restaurants. I’ve included a selection which appears at the top of this page. Not one comment has ever been made! I’m not saying some people there weren’t judging but they didn’t say anything. Lately I even made it an act of rebellion — eating with gusto, obviously enjoying my food as a fat person. I hope with time you can do that too and not eat one more salad you didn’t want. Just one request though — don’t try to make a joke of it. It’s easy to do to try and protect yourself but jokes about fat people have to stop.
Ok Claire, I should love myself and eat anything I want. What if what I really want is a salad?
Then that’s fine obviously! We have enough food police patrolling our lives and metaphorically pulling us over for us to do it to each other too. I’m not saying to love yourself and eat what you want in restaurants you need to order cake or pie or a burger just to rebel if it’s not what you feel like eating at the time. That would be crazy! Please make sure before ordering though that it is definitely what you want not what you think you should have.
I personally almost never order salads when I’m out to eat because there are usually more appealing options. Things are a bit more complicated or fancier than I would usually make at home. When I am at home though I love a good salad and it’s one of my staples when I’m meal prepping my lunches. Notice I said a good salad. There are a lot of extremely substandard salads out there which is partly why they get such a bad name. If you’re going to eat a salad and enjoy it needs to be as much of an event as anything else you might order.
What do you mean “an event”??
I mean that when you look at your food your senses should be excited at the different smells and colours. It should look appetising and make you keen to eat it. Food should be a delight, a rich satisfying experience. A lot of salads contain nothing more than some limp looking lettuce, a few tomatoes and some grated carrot. Sad and not appetising at all!
When I make mine I like it to be a riot of colour — red tomatoes, sunny yellow peppers and juicy purple beetroot for example. Salads can be a bit one-note texture wise so I add seeds for a pleasing crunch. Satiety is also a factor so I make sure there’s plenty of protein — chicken cooked with a rub, boiled eggs and hummus are all favourites of mine. When I have prepped a good salad I am looking forward to it all morning when I’m working. If you love salad to then enjoy the best one you can and experiment with flavours. If not then tuck in to whatever you want and screw what anyone else has to say! You can do it!
Thanks so much for taking the time to read my article. You have no idea how much it means to me. If you enjoyed it and would like to read more of my writing then you can visit my blog here.