GIVE UP CONTROL

Be Powerless to Be Powerful

You might be holding yourself back

In recovery, I learned I had to surrender to win. I had to let go and admit all that I was powerless over and trust in a power greater than myself. For me, that is the Universe. Something so vast and infinite that I cannot describe it.

I can see its power all around me. In the stars as they shine in the black night. In the leaves of trees as they dance in the breeze. In my son, as he flourishes and grows into the unique human he was always meant to be.

We are measly humans navigating a world of uncertainty. Often in fear, as we cannot predict the future. We hold onto all we can and try to control the outcome. But what happens when we give up control and let the Universe work its magic?

I recently went back to a place of surrender. No matter how much I want to control my future of uncertainty, I cannot. My life is changing and I have no control over the outcome. I have free will and can make a plan and decisions to lead me in the right direction. But, things don’t always go as planned.

I have decided to drop the reins, move with the horse, and let things happen as they will. My goals are attainable but are not guaranteed. I can’t do this alone, and I can’t rely on anyone else to help me. But when I surrender to a power greater than myself, I’m not alone.

Sometimes in life, we have to give it all up. We have to risk it all knowing we may fall flat on our faces, but hope that we soar instead. We pull an arrow backward before it can shoot forward. What if we must fall into darkness before we launch into the light?

They say experience is the most difficult teacher. She gives the test first, and the lesson after. I needed to learn and grow stronger from those dark and hopeless moments. Everything I have endured has been to shape me into a human who can withstand the storm. So I could finally find serenity after the chaos. Without those experiences, I couldn’t have made it this far.

When the light begins to shine through the chips and cracks of dark life, it creates a natural shift. You can start to see all you have to be grateful for. You’re given a reprieve and feel like things are finally looking up. You can relax and you can breathe.

I have been riding a wave of small wins. One tiny positive thing at a time. Like a crescendo in a beautiful piano piece. Small notes of beauty, building up to the climactic moment.

It’s been a long time since I have felt like I had a break in life. It feels like I’ve been in a dark place fighting battle after battle, for as long as I can remember. Now, I can see how I will win this war I have been fighting for at least three decades. It happens with each small moment of positivity.

By admitting all I am powerless over, I become powerful. By trusting in the Universe, I can see victory in my future. I know I can’t do it alone and need help. It’s unknown where that help will come from, or what kind of help it will be, but I trust it will come.

You might be struggling, too. Have you tried giving up control? Have you tried to trust in something greater than yourself? It’s surprising what can happen when you set your ego aside. You might be standing in your way. So give yourself a break and move. See what happens!

Love, Quinn