Summary

The article encourages self-reflection by observing one's own life as if being a 'fly on the wall', to gain deeper insight into one's thoughts, intentions, and behaviors.

Abstract

The concept of being a 'fly on the wall' is typically associated with secretly observing others, but the author suggests that it is more beneficial to apply this perspective to oneself. The article argues that by watching and listening to ourselves, we can uncover our true intentions, confront uncomfortable thoughts, and understand our body language and masks we wear. Drawing from personal experience, the author recounts how their father's advice to 'watch yourself walk by' instilled a habit of self-observation, leading to increased consciousness and the ability to break free from automatic patterns of thought and behavior. The author recommends embracing the role of a 'witnessing presence' to foster awareness and personal growth, especially in challenging times. The article concludes with a reference to another author, Michele Thill, who shares her own insights from self-observation, and an invitation to explore more mindfulness articles on the author's website.

Opinions

The author values the practice of self-observation as a means to personal understanding and growth.
Observing oneself without judgment is seen as a form of meditation and a path to becoming more conscious.
The author believes that being overly caught up in one's own thoughts and emotions leads to unconscious living.
The article suggests that the current times offer unique opportunities for self-reflection and learning about oneself.
The author endorses the concept of 'the witnessing presence' as described by Eckhart Tolle, as a way to enhance awareness and consciousness.
The author's father's advice implies a belief in the importance of self-accountability and the idea that self-awareness can guide one to live life 'better'.

Be a Fly on the Wall

Of your own life

Yesterday I overheard someone say, ‘I’d love to be a fly on the wall!’

He meant he’d love to be able to observe certain people and hear what they said about a particular subject without them knowing he was there.

Why would he want to do this?

Because we want to know what’s really going on, what other people’s hidden intentions or agendas are, what they’re like when they think no one is watching or listening. No one notices a fly on the wall, drinking it all in.

But a better way to spend your time is to be a fly on the wall of your own life.

Watch yourself. Listen to yourself.

What’s really going on? What are your hidden intentions and agendas? What thoughts are you not facing? What are you running away from? What does your body language say about you? What masks are you wearing?

If you weren’t you, what would you think of yourself?

My father, a truck driver and lay preacher, told us when we were children:

Watch yourself walk by.

He’d already taught us that God was watching us all the time, which was spooky enough. Now he was telling us to watch ourselves as well, which provided a double check on whatever we did or said.

I’ve since dropped my fear of an all-seeing eye in the sky, but the idea of stepping outside myself and watching me walk by, has stayed. It’s an instructive exercise. It’s a form of meditation. Not judging. Not psychoanalyzing. Just perceiving. Then stepping back into my body and moving on, with new insight of how to do life better. Being more conscious.

When I’m caught up in myself, trapped inside my mind, I’m unconscious. My life plays out like an old-fashioned record — the grooves already cut by my accumulative thoughts and emotions.

When I become the idiomatic fly on the wall, or watch myself walk by, I have an opportunity to be what Eckhart Tolle calls ‘the witnessing presence’. In this state, awareness arises. Consciousness grows.

So, don’t waste time wishing you were a fly on the wall of other people’s lives.

Be a fly on your own wall.

And, for variety, watch yourself walk by.

The times we’re living through are packed with moments for self-observation. Michele Thill shares heartfelt insights about what she has learned about herself over the last few months:

Dear Universe,

It’s me, Michele…

medium.com

With love, Marlane

Thanks for reading! I hope it helps you for the rest of your life. For more articles on Mindfulness, visit me at https://www.marlaneainsworth.com