Awesome Things Happen When You’re Being Authentic

It’s time to stand in your truth

Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.~Brené Brown

Do you live authentically?

Many of us are afraid of being accepted by others, so we hide our true selves from the outside world. Our inner world is rich with beauty and truth, yet we hold ourselves back.

When we reach inside and discover our authentic self, we might not want to hide anymore. Something shifts. We no longer care what anyone thinks. We decide to display our unique, exceptional spirits for everyone to see.

What if you let someone truly see you? What would that feel like? Are you brave enough to be yourself, even if others don’t approve or agree?

I decided long ago I didn’t feel comfortable conforming to others’ expectations. It took me a while to take action. One day I stopped following. I started leading from my center. I’m still in the midst of my transformation.

I made a few simple changes, and they led to more unfolding and revealing of the real me.

A couple of years ago, I wrote a piece entitled, “Mission Statement on Authenticity.” I shaved my head the following year. I haven’t been the same since.

I hope the following self-reflection will help you seek your truth. Perhaps it will compel you to write your mission statement.

I don’t follow societal expectations.

I don’t always shave my body hair. I haven’t worn a bra in years. I shop second hand or trade instead of buying new things. I don’t care what you think of any of it. But every day, society says that it matters.

I can’t fight that pervasive, damaging message I’m not good enough as I am. I experience cognitive dissonance every time I cover my beautiful face with makeup. I’ve had an unexplainable rash on my cheeks for years. I don’t need to be ashamed of that. Who I am is not what I look like, but sometimes I act otherwise.

I shaved my head in late May 2018. I released some of my attachments to beauty standards for womxn, what you think of my bald head, and how I see myself. I felt like I finally stepped into my truth.

I discovered a year later that there are more layers of the onion to peel. I feel awkward with my grown out locks. I want to ignore the nagging feeling that I’m still not good enough. My hair is not who I am inside. But our culture still expects me to identify with it.

I’d rather go barefoot or wear flip flops instead of shoes. I’d rather be comfortable than bend my feet into something unnatural to please others. I believe the most attractive people are those who follow their hearts.

I’m pansexual, so I fall in love with your soul, your personality, your values, and not your gender. I admire folx who identify as transgender, genderqueer, gender fluid, and anyone else who doesn’t fit the socially contracted mold. You are brave, and hold courage I don’t think I could ever muster.

I’m a pacifist by default, and a quiet activist.

I believe in the right to make personal choices about our bodies. I had an abortion at age 17. I wanted a baby. It wasn’t the right time. I’m not a murderer. I’m a person who broke a soul contract with another person who decided to be born later when I was ready.

I don’t need you to tell me I should have chosen adoption, I was sexually irresponsible, or I’ll burn in Hell. Everyone has their own Higher Power, including me and my unborn child.

Bodily autonomy is important to me. I don’t owe you a kiss or hug, and neither do my daughters. If you demand affection, expect a big fat No.

I’ve been sexually assaulted several times, mostly by people I already knew. It wasn’t my outfit or because I was drunk. It was because someone thought they had the right to touch me when I didn’t give them consent.

I’m as compassionate as they come. I know you probably weren’t given choices, or that you were forced to give your auntie a kiss too many times. I’m sure society sent you the wrong messages about consensual touch. Or you were drunk, too.

You still didn’t have the right to touch me without permission, and it still wasn’t my fault.

I believe it’s ok and sometimes necessary to ask for help, including the government.

We’re a global village, and we need to reclaim our purpose as people meant to connect, be of service, and to love each other.

When one person suffers, we all suffer. When we stop complaining and start taking loving, kind actions, we all benefit. By the way, I’m one of those people who lives on government assistance. I’m grateful.

I have a low tolerance for racist ideology and all of its ramifications.

Although I see it for its ignorance and low vibrational frequency, I still have a high need to avoid it. I won’t give anymore energy to the hate.

I have no patience for hateful actions. The only thing we can do is rise above it all with our innate love and light.

We can’t pretend it doesn’t exist, because the effects of racism are very real for people of color. We can place our focus on higher love vibration. It’s the only way out.

For anyone who claims that white people of privilege experience racism, I encourage you to sit for 10 minutes (at least). Consider any incidents where you felt your livelihood, family, work, friendships, or your life in general have been profoundly altered or endangered due to the color of your skin. I’m confident you’ll have a hard time finding anything.

For those of you flippantly saying that “all lives matter”, no one needs to be reminded of this. Just remember that Black lives matter, too. You may want to sit for 20 minutes (or more) to make sure you get it.

I accept that we don’t all agree on everything. I know some people won’t want to be my friend after they hear what I really think. I’m grateful. I’m perfect as I am, raw and unfinished.

Don’t let anyone interfere with your growth.

When you stand in your truth, you allow others to muster the courage to do the same. Those who don’t accept you in all your splendor are missing a prime opportunity to learn and grow

Maybe it’s uncomfortable to look inside themselves. They see authenticity missing in their lives. They might emerge from their cocoons one day because you were brave enough to do the same.

Until then, spread your illuminated butterfly wings and soar.

The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.~Carl Gustav Jung

Let’s stay in touch. You can find me on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn, or my personal blog at gratefulx365.wordpress.com. Submit your amazing stories and follow my Medium publication, Gratefully Yours.