Autism Dilemma: Being a Visionary

Why Your Gift is More Important Than You Realize — Even When They Don’t Appreciate It

Hey God,

What’s the point of being a “seer” if people don’t believe me? Yes, it’s a cool gift and I’m thankful for it. But I also have 0 social battery to even share message and low emotional resilience to deal with their reactions.

What gives?

I mean, I’m pretty dang gone good at being unliked. I’m pretty good at not caring one ioata either. Being a manager for 10 years will do that to you — having to make difficult and unpopular opinions. However in life, when you are so far ahead of your time, it makes the entirety of life, rejection after rejection.

What I learned to care about was if I was aligned to my true self — was I doing the right thing? The pain of not, is unmatched and haunting for me personally. I dont even want to answer to me, Im so strick with what I expect.

What everyone is doing has no sway. Moreso its the opposite. As someone who came to blaze the trail, I can bet 99% of what everyone is doing is not what I should be doing.

I think many autists are the same. How many times have you done something that’s common sense to you and someone comments how unusual it is.

Them: “Noone holds me accountable to what I say I will do”.

Me: “So… your word means nothing?”

Them: “Well sometimes things come up and plans change”.

Me: “That happens more often than not though.”

Them: “You know most people don’t think like that right?”

Me: “Like what? Like making a genuine effort to choose my words carefully and honestly as they affect others and myself?”

… the disagreement continues.

Honesty… what a novel idea! (sarcasm)

Keeping your word… there’s another one. (sarcasm again)

Choosing kindness… apparently not a no brainer. (wth)

These are common sense and to me critical to a well functioning community.

What I think what the vast majority of society is missing is the fact that we are all one and we are all connected. They can’t seem to see past the physical separation between us.

In almost every other realm we’re connected… energetic planes, spiritual planes. When we hurt one we’re hurting all of us and there are repercussions.

Living by the golden rule is the more important as people realize. They can’t keep turning on each other and not see consequences of the “I win, you loose” mentality.

If we are all part of the same team, Earthlings, we all loose when one of us does.

Right now, people with good hearts are getting used, abuse and manipulated. Quite frankly, I’m sick of it. It takes courage to be honest, open hearted and kind. In my experience, these have been the general characteristics of Autistics.

In my opinion because we’re supposed to be the trailblazers in this regard — transforming how we treat each other, amongst other ways we lead.

They are qualities that are of a higher vibration and a higher consciousness.

However when we try and bring it down to the rest of the world and speak our truth to those who are not ready — it causes a lot of backlash for that person.

I know for me, it was very frustrating to see things that I tried to implement and share fall on deaf ears and be cast out for those ideas. Then I would turn around and see those very people take my ideas and run with them. No credit given of course.

I suppose in part, keeping relationships and getting buy in is not my specialty. It wasn’t until my ideas started making my boss a lot of money, that my ideas were welcome.

However to begin, it really took me just managing up (ignoring my boss) because he didn’t make any sense and doing what I wanted anyway. Once I had put in so much effort and had my heart behind the idea, he didn’t say no. That was a blessing though, and an exception to the rule.

Part of the frustration is seeing a better way, more efficient way, more direct way of doing something and people not going along with the vision — especially when it was a win-win. It’s just as an autist, you don’t always have the social skills or relationships to be able to enact the change as easily as others.

As someone who trained managers and was a manager for 10 years, that’s a huge part of a business, change management. Leading is not only having vision but getting others to rally behind your vision. For me the interpersonal relationships took way more effort and energy than the actual job.

It feels odd at times to have such, what feels like a mismatch of skills. Have the vision but not the social skills. That’s why being a General Manager worked well for me — my assistant and shift managers (if they were good) would be able to assist in carrying out the vision. It was less relationships to manage. However the part “if they were good” was a huge factor.

It can be painful when you have auch empathy for others, want more for them — but they dont consider your thoughts. Its worse when 10 years from now, they agree.

My sister once told me that “sometimes you’re just a seed planter”. Essentially you’re planting ideas in the minds of people that eventually could take root.

You might be vegan around them and that plants the seed. Then they see a video about veganism. Then they meet another vegan. Next they go through a health crisis and finally go vegan.

As somebody that wants to know if I’m making an impact or if I’m wasting my time — that’s a hard thing to do(be a “seed planter”).

I like to be very efficient with everything that I do and if I don’t see a point in what I’m not going to continue. I simply don’t have the energy to waste on anything or anyone, so I try to use what little energy I have wisely.

I just know my capabilities and what energetic balance I carry.

In my late 20s, early 30s, I felt a lot of resentment. Before that time, when people would dismiss my ideas, I used to believe other people and I was wrong. After getting some experience under my belt and working with a lot of people, I understood my ideas were not the problem. Many of those ideas were simply ahead of my time or too honest and I would often be persecuted for those beliefs.

I would see somebody doing my idea time after time after time. I of course, would get 0 credit for it.

It’s not about being seen in the eyes of society in a certain way, it’s just about feeling like there’s an actual purpose for me and other autistic people being here with the gift of vision and ideas so far ahead of their time.

Just like my question to God in the beginning of this article: What’s the point of this “gift” if people don’t listen.

My ex best friend’s father was a pioneer to the solar industry. I believe since now knowing more about autism, that he was autistic as well. He also was very spiritual, before his time, ecoteric and thought about things in a philosophical way as I do.

Yet these are some of the many reasons he took his life, because it was so hard to be so far ahead.

In the twin flame community there’s one gentleman that spoke about creating “energetic templates”. I think that is, in part what autistics and those born so far ahead or doing.

When we’ve gone through a spiritual awakening, we’re blazing the path. When we’ve gone through certain experiences are worked through trauma, we’re helping to heal the collective and make it easier for the next person.

Once you’ve done it, even on a energetic level, somebody else can hook into that energetic current. Because they’re in your presence, they can use that template that you created to heal and makes it easier to go through whatever they are going through.

Its an interesting proposition and one that I wouldn’t doubt. Namely because I’ve seen so much that things have gone through 10/15 years ago are now happening for the majority of people.

One time, I channeled a message for my friend and it was one I never would’ve come up with myself. He was leaving a job and going into a brand new field. He was feeling down and frustrated upon leaving that job — as if he failed.

I began texting him support when the message began to write through me. His purpose for working at that job, was more so an energetic purpose. Being there, being in high vibration and consciousness, simply existing was his purpose.

So many times, we would be in high vibration together. I know the power of that energy and what it can do. Some days when we were high on life, it was almost as if we floated through the day.

I then understood the gift and the channeling essentially meant that being in that vibration around people is a bigger gift than you can understand.

At that point in my life I was very big on things in the physical being your purpose — as in your purpose is what you do or things that you say or a business you create. However in that moment I realized that that’s not always the case — it can be the energy you bring and the template you hold.

Surely I was being short-sighted and really discounting the energy that a person brings with my old theory.

There is a quote I heard from Teal Swan that said:

“Autistic people have one foot in the spiritual realm and 1 foot in the physical realm. That’s why it’s so hard to assimilate and ground into the Earth because they have one foot somewhere else.”

The romantic way I prefer to say is “we are here to bring heaven to Earth”.

However, I think that ties in with the dilemma that a lot of autistic people have and goes with being a visionary and having “old school values” is that it means that we are alone a lot.

To be honest with you — I believe this is really a protective mechanism from the universe, to keep us authentic and not as taken advantage of by the world (since we are in it less).

It’s similar in a way to the blessing of being single. You have time to get yourself healthier, more stable and fall more in love with yourself. Especially if you have a lot of unhealed trauma, being single is definitely a good thing — otherwise you would attract more of that unhealed trauma to you.

I see the isolation in a good way. For one its protection from manipulative people that prey on those with “disabilities”. For two, it’s protection from loosing authenticity. We don’t have the ability because of isolation to try to fit in, trying to please other people. Often we have a natural fail safe from the universe like overstimulation, burnout or sickness if we try.

Quite honestly the vibration of authenticity is 400x that of love. So no wonder we would have so many fail-safes to protect it.

It can be a great temptation, especially for those that are starved of validation to attempt to be who someone wants them to be in exchange.

Even for an autistic, the lure of such an unspoken deal can be hard to turn down. If accepted, the price will usually be paid in full.

I wonder if autistics were not loners, as most of us are — would we too be engulfed by the presence of other people, not be able to form our own identity as easily or be able to hold a steadfast presence? Who knows.

My old best friend used to be surrounded by people all the time and I didn’t understand how he could do it. I need my alone time to recalibrate to myself — to check in and make sure I am taking direction from my own compass.

I thought it was quite silly to just go along with the opinions of others, just because they are around you often. I wondered how he could not have time to himself to even think, explore his feelings or his thoughts. He just went along with what his family thought was right and cared more about what they thought than what we thought.

I try to put myself in his shoes and think about — if I’m that busy to where I can’t even have time to think for myself — that must be really horrible.

It made me appreciate all the time that I do have to myself — working by myself and that I can hear myself and my inner voice.

It’s not been an easy road. I think sometimes we all just wish to be like other people — “the grass is always greener on the other side”.

Being able to see the experiences of others usually makes me appreciate my own talents and skills — and how they can be a gift to myself and others.

So if you are an autistic that sometimes struggles with being a visionary but it’s hard to get people to back you and suffer isolation because of it — take heed.

Sometimes the very things that set us apart are often the gifts that also bring us together. However it’s only when we accept them — the good and the bad alike.

By acknowledging and loving ourselves more fully — we can love others differences and their skillets more fully.

All changes start within.

I hope this article pointed a different perspective on some of the positive sides to some common autistic challenges.

It’s not to slap a happy sticker over hard times but to see a more balanced picture and perhaps one that is zoomed out — to see how it benefits society as a whole.

As we acknowledge our own purpose and value — we find more peace and exemplify that for others.