Assets to Divide Following Dissolution of Marriage Between A Fisherman and the Sea

Assets of PETER K. WESTBROOK, fisherman

Three pairs of boots

Rain slicker

Boat (full size)

Boat (miniature, in bottle)

Fishing rod, line and lures (to be considered single asset)

Old hat

Beard scraggler

Beard de-scraggler

Whiskey

Deck swabber (to be known here as “mop,” for legal purposes)

Assets of THE SEA, sea

1 million known species of marine life

Expanse of unknowable mystery

Water

Great Barrier Reef

Other, less great barrier reefs

All the garbage

Mermaids?

Apparatus for separating men from boys

Waves (size ranging from small to large)

The Good Wife, seasons 1–5 on Blu-ray