Ask These 10 Questions to Get to Know Your Family Better

A simple way to open up a dialogue and deepen relationships

I want to know my family better. I have always felt like I had a tight-knit, close family. And while we are pretty close, I have come to the realization that I don’t really know much about my family.

Each time a birthday rolls around, and I am searching for ideas on what to get someone, I realize I don’t know anything about them. I am utterly clueless.

Below are 10 questions I am asking to hopefully start a dialogue and begin to learn more about my family, bringing us closer.

Here are 10 questions I am asking my family to get to know them better

1. What are your dreams?

Everyone has them, and this question will give you an inside look at what your family member’s wants and desires out of life are. Knowing someone’s dreams provides incredible insight into their life.

2. What are your goals?

This goes along with #1, but is a little more immediate, what are they shooting for in the next few months or years to reach their dreams. Maybe you can even help them reach their goals faster.

3. What does family mean to you?

Everyone has a different answer for this question, it’s fun to see what each person feels like the word Family means. It can help you develop a stronger relationship.

4. What makes you happy?

This one is super important, in order to deepen a relationship you need to know what ultimately makes them happy, what they like. Perhaps you can contribute to their happiness in some small way.

5. What are 3 of your “Likes”?

Pretty self explanatory, in order to know someone better, you need to know what they like.

6. What are 3 of your “Dislikes”?

Goes hand in hand with #5.

7. What are your hobbies?

I found out that I have no idea what any of my family members do with their spare time. Gaining this knowledge will help you better understand what makes each person tick. (And can be helpful come Christmas-time when searching for gift ideas)

8. What is one word you would use to describe me?

This one gets interesting. Once you figure out what another person thinks of you, at least in one word, you can work on improving your relationship and solidifying your bond.

9. What is your biggest fear?

Another useful question, providing a deeper dive into their psyche. Maybe you can help them with this, or remove this fear completely. Who knows, but at least it will bring you closer knowing what scares them the most, you may even share this fear in common.

10. What can I do to make our relationship stronger?

This might be the most important question. It’s vital information to know what you need to do to strengthen your bond. Maybe you are doing enough right now, maybe doing too much or too little? You won’t know until you ask.

Use this exercise as a jumping off point. Whether you do this in person, or via email, phone or text, these 10 questions are a great place to start. Sometimes a 10 minute phone or text conversation can turn into an all-nighter, with hundreds of questions being asked. You will be surprised at what you can find out from someone if you just ask.