Asian Confessions: Defying the Stereotypes
A light-hearted take on cultural assumptions
The stereotyping of Asian Americans as the “model minority” is a serious topic. And while there are many very good sources discussing the impacts of it, this story won’t be one of them.
I’m all for advocating for equality. I’m all for putting an end to racial discrimination. I’m all for putting those prejudices behind us.
It’s just that it’s a real downer. It’s a depressing topic riddled with heartbreaking stories and unfair situations.
I can’t stand up to the full momentum from centuries of society’s stereotypes. But I can dispel a few of the more light-hearted stereotypes if you’re interested.
Let’s begin.
- I’m not good at math
Once upon a time, I used to rock the “mad minutes” math exercises in school. Not because I’m Asian, but because my parents made me do Kumon, so basically after I finished math homework from school, my reward was … more math homework.
As a professional engineer, I’ve taken (and passed) advanced-level calculus classes. At one point, I could even do the fancy math that has more letters in it than numbers.
But sometime after the popularization of smartphones, my brain got lazy. It’s just too convenient carrying a calculator (in disguise) in your pocket!
2. I don’t like dim sum
There are many delicious culinary gems in Asian cuisine. To say “Asian cuisine” is already too wide of a sweeping generalization. There are many delicious culinary gems in Chinese cuisine.
But I really don’t like dim sum and for some reason, this regularly surprises people.
I know there’s a lot of variety to dim sum, and I generally take it as a compliment to my ethnic heritage when people tell me how much they like dim sum. It’s basically Chinese tapas and with so many choices, how can I so broadly and generally say I don’t like dim sum? Well, I just don’t … #sorrynotsorry
3. I use my dishwasher
For many Asian immigrant households, the dishwasher is a glorified dish drying rack, and it was the same in my household when I was growing up.
When I ask them why they don’t use their dishwasher for cleaning dishes, some (i.e. my mother) will tell me it’s a waste of water. Others (i.e. my mother-in-law) look at me in confusion like the thought of using the dishwasher for that purpose has never even crossed their minds.
For me, I just think hand washing dishes is a drag and if I can speed up this chore, great! Also, there may or may not be some scientific backing to the claims that using the dishwasher is a more efficient use of water?
4. I prefer to shower in the morning instead of at night
Growing up, showering at night was the norm in my family. I didn’t even think of showering in the morning. It’s hard enough to get up in time for school or work, and my parents were definitely of the mentality that you ought to wash the daily grime off before crawling into bed.
Why did I switch over to the morning shower routine?
It’s not really for any cultural reasons. I changed my hairstyle and got bangs. Bangs are finicky at the best of times and, considering how I don’t sleep as “nicely” as Sleeping Beauty does, let’s just say I’ve had some interesting hairstyles in the mornings …
5. I feel pretty apathetic about rice
For me to feel apathetic about rice is actually already an “improvement”.
As a kid, I hated rice. I dreaded seeing it at dinner time. If my parents made me eat it, I’d try to maximize the “anything but rice” ratio paired with the rice.
I’m not quite sure where this hate came from since it’s a pretty strong feeling for a pretty mild thing. Its mildness is exactly why I’m so apathetic about rice. Plain rice is never the star of the dish. It’s at best a side dish, if not just a medium for the tasty stuff. So why get so excited about it?
Well, apparently I’m very much in the wrong and many cultures are very excited about rice…
6. I don’t have a hot water boiler
This thing — if you don’t even know what I’m referring to.
It’s not that I don’t use hot water regularly. I drink tea rather obsessively, but I’ve never been tempted to buy a hot water boiler for on-command, instant hot water.
Why? Because I think it looks ugly. Because I have too many kitchen appliances already. Because I have limited counter space. And because I have a kettle … why is the humble kettle being shoved aside?!
7. I never got loads of money for Chinese New Year
Not gonna lie, I didn’t understand why Asian kids were supposed to be excited for Chinese New Year. As the only Chinese kid in my class, most of my classmates didn’t even know what Chinese New Year was and it wasn’t like we got the day off school.
Sure, my parents still gave us the red envelopes but it was more symbolic. Even as an elementary school kid, it’s hard to get excited about the pocket change that your mom literally dumped out from your dad’s pockets.
Let’s pause here. Seven confessions seem like a good place to stop for now.
Do these things make me less Asian? If ethnicity could so easily be watered down, then would racial tensions have simmered since the start of civilization?
Do you judge me for these confessions? For the most part, I tried to explain these confessions, whether it’s simply a matter of personal preference or an adjustment to daily routines for some pretty mundane reasons.
Not everything has to be a cultural revolution or a power stance on ethnic identity. Sometimes, I just want to be plain ol’ simple me.
