Are You Meant For More?

Are you sharing enough with the world?

How much do you share with the world?

What do you have to share? What are your best talents, skills, and resources? What lessons have you learned that you can pass on to help others? Do you ask yourself these questions?

We do not learn from experience… we learn from reflecting on experience. ― John Dewey

I recently considered a new perspective. Every issue we ever encountered could be meant as a teaching tool. Attached to each of the messes we’ve gone through there may be a responsibility to share a message. This idea places urgency on improving my own reflective skills so that I can be more intentional and consistent in my giving.

High Score

In my mind, I see a few minor ramps I encountered that made life a little harder. I see some doors that fluttered open and shut like the flippers in a pinball machine. I squeezed through some of them on one foot leading with one of my shoulders shifted in front of the other-just barely squeaking by. Some of the doors closed too quickly, and I was diverted, bouncing from one bumper to another, quickly changing directions. Like the ball in a pinball game, I was propelled and bounced around to earn some points in life, steadily pulled along by the force of time.

Looking back, I don’t see any lights or hear any whistles — in my mind, my impact hasn’t yet earned me a Top Score or even a place on the board of High Scores.

My idea of earning a Top Score in life is fulfilling my responsibility of giving back. I know there is no real score accumulating, evidence of this fulfilled responsibility is going to come in the form of a feeling. High-level reflection skills are an essential component.

Lack of Clarity

The pinball machine image I carry in my mind discounts the size of the ramps I have faced. It also discounts the work it took to overcome them.

I do believe in signs, shifts, and supports from the universe and others, but it wasn’t only chance and outside forces that got me through some of those quickly closing doors or that created a new path when other doors closed. It was also me. It was me putting in hard work. It was me working long hours and extra jobs. It was me sacrificing in the short term for my long-term goals and overlooking my own wants and needs to help others. None of this just happened spontaneously. My actions played a big role in these outcomes.

I grossly underestimate the impact of my own efforts in my own life. I do the same when considering the impact I may have on others.

Gaining Clarity

I recognize this pattern and lack of clarity from my work coaching teachers. I work through month-long coaching sessions with teachers to implement effective instructional strategies. Our results come in the form of authentically engaged students and layered evidence of student learning.

Many times when I have asked a teacher why they think a particular lesson went so well. Some ignored all of the work we did together and attributed the success to the students who were really good that day. To that, I say in my mind, WHAT!? I then reframe the question. What one thing did you do that was most impactful in this success? It seems like an easy question, but the struggle to answer this more direct question shines a light on the teacher’s level of reflection.

Unaware: Unaware of best practices. Aware: Knows best practices, not yet implementing intentionally/effectively. Applying: Applying best practices intentionally/effectively and sometimes connecting next steps. Taking some accountability for the impact of actions. Proficient: Intentional/effective implementation and connecting next steps consistently. Full accountability for the impact of actions.

Sorry, I reverted to my education life. But, these concepts are transferable to all aspects of life. If we are unaware or inconsistent in anything we do in life we will not be able to intentionally or effectively repeat our successes to our fullest potential.

Taking Action

Through this reflection, I am seeing an example of knowing and not doing. I know this concept in coaching teachers but I don’t apply it to my own life. I underestimate the gifts, talents, and resources that I have, how I share them, and the potential I have to share more.

I was stuck thinking I didn’t go through many tough things in my life. I wouldn’t call my results super successes in the things I did get through.

I had to again revisit how am I measuring impact? I don’t recognize the size of the ramps I have overcome or the action steps I took in my successes. I don’t give myself any credit, as if the world just tipped a little and everything fell into place, like all of the pinball machine tippers out there — yes, we see you, and that is cheating! It won’t work in life.

This is where my coaching strategy can be applied. When the teachers say, the kids were just great today. I have to remind them…no…YOU were great today!

Of course, the same level of accountability must go with the less than successful moments, but those lessons can be useful if acknowledged as well. There is a message in every experience. If we are aware of the impact of our own actions we can work towards better results and more intentionality and consistency.

Are you getting the messages that are meant for you? Are you sharing your messages?

Doubt

I have answered NO to these two questions before deeper reflection. I wasn’t getting all of the messages that were meant for me and I wasn’t sharing enough.

I doubted that my life is full of messages. I doubted that my messages are important to others. I doubted my ability to deliver my messages to those that need them.

Reflection is my doubt-buster. Do you have doubts that hold you back?

Ripples

There are people out there that need your message as it can only be told by you. I am working to become more intentional about how I define my gifts, talents, and resources and how I share my messages with the world.

Reflection, finding out what blocks my clarity and what causes doubt when it is time to take action, as well as planning my next steps will increase my intentional consistency.

I recently listened to Dean Graziosi talk about the ripple effect of our service to others. He asked two important questions that I hope you will ask yourself. Who will you impact? Who will they impact?

Thanks for reading! I hope everyone finds a way to make impactful waves and also affords themselves the opportunity to feel the generous ripples of others.

I have pondered this topic in the past, wondering, am I passing on my passions? What are you passing on?

Thanks to Diana C. for the space to reflect and share messages with weekly prompts. Friday: Write about the ways in which you generously share your gifts, talents and resources with the world.