Are You Afraid?

Or Did You Just Piss God Off on a Lark?

Would you be afraid to talk about your spiritual beliefs? There are lots of people who might not want to hear what you believe in because they might be afraid you have some sort of evil intention to instill doubt in their lives. Lots of people prefer that their boats not get rocked around, whether we’re talking about God or cookie recipes.

So, I suppose my question would be, “Are you afraid?” You might say, “Afraid of what?” I would counter with, “Are you afraid of anything?”

To that, you could say, “Sure, I’m afraid of all sorts of things. I’m afraid of spiders. I’m afraid of things that scuttle across the floor in the twilight of approaching night. Things I can’t see clearly disappear into the closet or under the bed. I’m afraid of taxes. I just don’t understand the rules, and I’m afraid of breaking the law. I’m afraid of having to throw an entire dinner away because I used too much salt. I guess I’m afraid of many things.”

So, you say, “Okay, it does seem that you are afraid of some stuff. But are you afraid of offending God if you are angry?”

“What?”

“Do you think you can tempt fate by being angry at God? Do you think a thunderbolt is going to strike you down? Do you think the devil is going to peek around the corner and say, ‘Gotcha!’ while he is dancing delightedly on his cloven hoofs?”

“I think you’re nuts.”

“Good.”

“Why did you say good?”

“Because now I want to talk to you about spiritual belief.”

“Oh, go ahead. I’m not afraid.”

My spiritual beliefs have changed a lot during my life. I grew up in a Catholic family, and other than the basics, my impression was that there were many rules to follow. I used to make up sins in the confessional to keep things rolling along and interesting. I was always puzzled when I had to say how many times I had heckled my brothers. I usually made up something that sounded reasonable to my seven-year-old self. I wonder what the priest thought about it. Maybe he was doing a crossword puzzle.

I remember when I was in the 3rd or 4th grade in Saturday morning catechism class that somebody told me only Catholics could get into heaven. I was astounded. If they weren’t going to Heaven, that pretty much left three other places: Limbo, Purgatory, or Hell. I learned later that the difference between Limbo and Purgatory was that Limbo was where babies who died went if they hadn’t yet been baptized before they died. Purgatory was for people who’d been bad but not so bad that they went to Hell straight away after they died. Purgatory was for souls who still needed to do some work before they could get into Heaven, which is what I think Catholics are supposed to think now.

It was all sort of complicated and, to my child-like mind, wrong. It was just plain wrong, and it was at that point that I began to rebel. I remember when I was in my teens exploring other faiths, and my father had what he thought was a serious talk with me. Of course, I didn’t listen. But I remember him being concerned I was going to be swallowed up by a cult. I was practicing yoga at the time.

Fifteen years ago, the official stance in the Catholic religion was that Limbo got abolished. They still believe in Purgatory, and evidently, now everybody gets to go there first before they get into Heaven. But can non-Catholics get into Heaven? God knows. I did a little research on the internet, and it would appear the answer is complicated.

I decided years ago that the Catholics were wrong and did something about it. I began to do a lot of reading about other people’s belief systems. So, at this point? Yes, I still believe in God. Whether God is he, she, or it, I don’t know, and I actually don’t care.

There was a time when I was a C&E Catholic. That is a Catholic who goes to mass two times every year on Christmas and on Easter. Now, I suppose I am a lapsed Catholic. But I’m okay with it.

I’m a psychic now, too, so I talk to dead guys, and I talk to spiritual teachers. I have fun with missionaries of any sort of religion who come to my door and ask me if I have been saved by Jesus. I say, “Yes, do you want to talk to him?” Word spreads, and they don’t come back. My husband just answers the door in his pajama bottoms. Some poor woman was with her husband once. They left quickly.

I’m okay with any religion or belief system or lack of belief system. Hey, they all work at this point in my life.

What I believe in is right and wrong. I also believe in karma, which is the idea that what goes around comes around. If you do bad things, you’d better expect repercussions, whether they occur in this lifetime or the next.

This also comes around to the idea that I believe in reincarnation. I know a lot of people talked about it, but I didn’t believe it in my deepest being. That is until I started doing past life regressions and experienced little bits and pieces of what I believe were my previous lifetimes. Also, I actually met somebody as a teenager and was so instantly drawn to him, I had no frame of reference to understand it other than we must have known each other in some other lifetime. It didn’t occur to me that he might also have been a soul mate. I learned about all of that later on.

So, do I believe in the devil and in Hell? I believe in evil, disturbed people, and disturbed spirits. I’m not sure at this point if they are ghosts or something else. I have come to understand that if there is a lot of uncontrolled psychic energy, as would happen with people in their teenage years or with somebody who has an out-of-control sort of mental issue, those conditions could attract negative and what appear to be malevolent energies. But I don’t believe in the devil, and I don’t believe in Hell.

Seth, my spirit guide, said one time when I was complaining about a politician, “We have plans for him.” I thought it was funny. Then another time, he said, “We have hot places in Heaven too.” Again, I thought it was funny.

From my understanding, it is only Heaven, and there are lots of ways to experience it. It depends on where you are in your life journey, how old your soul is, what your life goals are inside and outside of the reincarnation process, and how you lived your life.

What do I think now? I don’t think it really matters what we think. I think it does matter how you live your life. I think it matters that you are not a victim and understand there is nobody out to get you. You make the decisions. You are in charge of your life. If life deals you a bad hand? Make the best of it, however you are able. And, if you ruin dinner? Throw it out and order pizza.

Thanks for reading.