Are Women Actually Hypergamous By Nature?

Do women desire a man who earns more?

Women want a man who earns more than they do. I have heard this opinion a few times, especially from men.

But is it only an opinion or a fact?

This phenomenon is also called hypergamy. Hypergamy means something like the act of ‘marrying up.’ In other words, dating or marrying someone of higher socioeconomic status than oneself. so to speak someone who has more money and prestige than oneself.

Especially in earlier days, hypergamy was probably an important mating strategy for women, as Mark Manson describes in “The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck”.

For most of human history, romantic love was not celebrated as it is now. In fact, up until the mid-nineteenth century or so, love was seen as an unnecessary and potentially dangerous psychological impediment to the more important things in life — you know, like farming well and/or marrying a guy with a lot of sheep. Young people were often forcibly steered clear of their romantic passions in favor of practical economic marriages that would yield stability for both them and their families.

Is there really anything to this? Are women really fundamentally more hypergamous?

I have no idea. My gut tells me that it could be true, but it could also be a pure myth. Let’s look at what the hard facts tell us.

Several Studies Give Us An Insight

A 2016 study by the University of British Columbia showed that although women tend to achieve higher educational attainment than men, most women have a partner who earns more than them.

Another research looked at the income gap in couples between 1980 and 2012. the conclusion the study reached was:

Between 1980 and 2008–2012, educational assortative mating reversed from a tendency for women to marry up to a tendency for women to marry down in education, whereas the tendency for women to marry men with higher incomes than themselves persisted.

Moreover, in both time periods, the tendency for women to marry up in income was generally greater among couples in which the wife’s education level equaled or surpassed that of the husband than among couples in which the wife was less educated than the husband.

According to these findings, hypergamy seems to still exist today. Well-educated women seem to be particularly demanding, which is why a better-earning man is especially important to them.

What are possible reasons for that?

The Reasons For Hypergamy

There are various attempts to explain the phenomenon of hypergamy. However, one conclusion, which is definitely wrong and harmful is that women are gold diggers.

Unfortunately, this statement is repeatedly made. Especially by less financially successful men.

Certainly, this is true for individual women, but there are much more logical explanations for the basic desire for a financially stable partner:

1. The Gender Pay Gap

Especially in the past, women earned much less than men. Even today, there is a huge pay gap between the sexes. Since women are generally at a disadvantage, it makes sense to look for a financially stronger partner. Especially if you want to have and raise children.

2. Evolutionary Reasons

The Parental Investment Strategy describes the influence of the necessary investment of one sex of a species in case of producing offspring on its sexual strategy. The main message is the following:

The sex that has to invest more in its offspring is typically more choosy in selecting a partner. For us humans, this is clearly the female.

This choosiness also applies to finances. After all, a certain degree of financial security increases the standard of living and, ultimately, the survival chances of the offspring. Hypergamy can therefore be described as an evolutionarily sensible mating strategy.

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