Are Indian Men Mentally healthy?

The title might sound surprising for a country labelled as patriarchal. India has often been accused of being male-dominated. For decades, NGOs, media houses and human rights activists have worked actively to bring awareness around women’s safety and well being. Amongst all of this, the fact which has been ignored is the fact than Men are equally vulnerable.

As a male child, I was fortunate to witness unconditional love from both my parents. My father was dominating but my mother’s opinions were never ignored nor disrespected. In spite of being part of a stable family, I grew up in an atmosphere of great anxiety and confusion.

Men are expected to ensure the financial stability of our family. Our emotional stresses are always ignored and our masculinity is measured by our attitude towards life and its challenges. Being a man is assumed to be our biggest gift and we are often humiliated by our sisters, wives and female friends for taking away their freedom.

Physical abuse against men in India is considered a joke and a disgrace on a man’s physical capabilities. There is no official definition of rapes against men and our understanding of rape revolves around intercourse only.

People are so obsessed with women's safety that Men are slowly becoming the forgotten gender. Family, emotional and social responsibilities are increasing the stress levels exponentially. In addition to this, men are constantly blamed for any act of violence or sexual abuse. Most of the time, men are declared guilty by media houses without any investigation. Legal and government authorities are no different. The incident of Sarvjeet vs Jasleen Kaur is a perfect example. Political parties gained mileage and the life of Sarvjeet was turned upside down in a moment.

Let's talk about some facts from the latest NCRB reports around suicides committed by Indian men.

Suicides Rates from the NCRB report published in 2017.

Suicide rates among men increases as they grow up. Although this point is open to perceptions, it does highlight the fact that the stress level of Indian men deserves attention and care.

Suicide Rates due to family problems

The above table highlights the fact that Men commit more suicides in comparison to women due to family problems. Society sees Men as superheroes capable of resolving any family issues. The incapability of doing so takes them on a guilt trip and lack of help does not make the whole situation better.

I can go on and forth digging in more conclusions from this report. The point I would rather want to make is the fact that men get abused as well. The pain is equally felt by a man and they deserve tender love and care as well. They are equally vulnerable in a country where insecurity is a common man’s God gift.

I hope men reading this article take steps to improve their mental health. Although there is not much help available in India, awareness is extremely important. Save India Family Foundation (SIFF) is an NGO that does a lot of meaningful work in creating awareness of men's rights and issues. SIFF provides training and mentoring in handling men issues. They have meeting centres in major Indian cities which guide people in handling relationship and life issues.

I have personally experienced the pain and anxiety of being an Indian man. Fortunately, my parents and SIFF were of great help. I could openly cry in front of them without the fear of being labelled as weak or unmanly.

Hopefully, you will find someone in your life as well.

Thanks, Tarun

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