Applicants with criminal histories are welcome to apply. Reading this line gave me the best laugh I’ve had in a while. It was posted by my former employer, Epsilon, where I worked for 15 years and was laid-off over the phone.

They told me several times I was “eligible for rehire.” After five failed attempts to get back in and secure a regular paycheck again, I finally wised up to the bastards.

Each time, I was virtually ignored, with no explanation why I couldn’t get the gigs, even though they were at a significantly lower pay scale than what I’d been making.

At Epsilon, it appears that “You can be a friggin’ felon and we’ll welcome you with open arms. As long as you were born in the right decade!”

One of the people they hired instead of me, got bounced for “anger issues” and a criminal record! Go figure.